Health, Food and Diets: Today, it’s the third month of my diet. Every dream I’ve had...

By maisumepg - 17/02/2019 04:00

Today, it’s the third month of my diet. Every dream I’ve had since I started has been entirely about junk food. Every. Single. One. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 102

You deserved it 304

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Dream baby dream

By lani - 24/05/2021 00:00

Today, and since I decided to cut back on unhealthy foods, my last five dreams were literally just slideshows of junk food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 772

You deserved it 125

By human - 21/06/2019 00:01

Today, I had a dream in which I was eating vast quantities of pizza, cookies, and pastries. I became so anxious about all the calories that I woke up. Even in my dreams I'm self conscious about my diet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 521

You deserved it 239

Spooky

By early grave - 17/10/2023 02:30

Today, I discovered that I am going to the store, buying junk food, and eating it almost every night… entirely in my sleep. So much for being healthy and not dying in my forties. FML

I agree, your life sucks 640

You deserved it 189

Hmmm, candy

By SleepEat - 25/02/2021 21:30

Today, I found out that I eat candy in my sleep. For two months I've been dieting because of my weight and high risk of diabetes. I now know why nothing has changed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 840

You deserved it 160

Which toppings?

By neverhealthy - 01/10/2019 02:01

Today, I read that food cravings are only supposed to last a couple of minutes. I have been craving and dreaming about pizza for a month straight, and the urge is only getting stronger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 273

You deserved it 241

What's it about?

By k…… - 02/04/2021 02:01

Today, I've had the exact same dream every night for a month. I'm sick of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 772

You deserved it 91

I'm in hell

By GiveMeCake - 02/12/2018 22:00

Today, thanks to pregnancy hormones, I had the most vivid dream of eating a caramel apple mousse cake with vanilla bean ice cream. Unfortunately, yesterday, also thanks to pregnancy hormones, I was diagnosed with diabetes. My dreams are taunting me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 919

You deserved it 259

By daydreamer - 29/07/2012 05:12 - United States - Wilton

Today, I began to daydream about going on a diet and losing some weight. As I did so, I unknowingly reached for a giant bag of chips and ate the whole thing. Now, I have stopped daydreaming and am sitting alone and depressed. And I'm all out of chips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 164

You deserved it 29 288

No pain, no gain

By skinny & doomed - 06/06/2021 20:01

Today, after two full months of trying to gain weight, I haven’t gained a single pound. Instead, I now have severe and irreversible digestive problems from overeating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 862

You deserved it 198

By Ew - 26/05/2016 13:02 - United States - Washington

Today, I went for a three-mile run. I was really proud of myself until I woke up from my dream in my bed, surrounded by empty soda bottles and fast food bags. I haven't worked out in years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 455

You deserved it 12 092

Lily_Rain77 25

Sunday 17 February 2019 4:27

Good for you, sticking with it for 3 months when you're literally dreaming about junk food. Keep it up!

Shreyan Dwivedi 21

Sunday 17 February 2019 4:54

Make a list of those things. From that list pick the best ones. Then from the best list pick 3 things. And eat them on your cheat day.

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 17 February 2019 4:14

Oh, give me a break. Break me off a piece of that Kit Kat bar. I’m lovin’ it. Taste the rainbow!

Lily_Rain77 25

Sunday 17 February 2019 4:27

Good for you, sticking with it for 3 months when you're literally dreaming about junk food. Keep it up!

Shreyan Dwivedi 21

Sunday 17 February 2019 4:54

Make a list of those things. From that list pick the best ones. Then from the best list pick 3 things. And eat them on your cheat day.

thelittlem 15

Sunday 17 February 2019 11:33

Do diets actually work for anyone?

iceberg 10

Sunday 17 February 2019 16:40

Yeah they're depressing....

RichardPencil 30

Tuesday 19 February 2019 2:55

Yep. A tiny minority of us have success with them.

bloopaloop 27

Sunday 17 February 2019 14:47

Good job! I've known 4 people who've lost 50+ lbs and I asked them what they did. They all said "stopped eating, started running". Keep it up!

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Monday 18 February 2019 2:53

Sounds like you can only have the food you really want in your dreams! But hey, good for you sticking to your diet for three months! You can do it!

Keywords

Kids Music Names Work Customers Awkward Coworkers Bodyshaming Landlords Money Roommate AITA Parents Allergies Dogs Singing Cute Neighbours Embarrassing Accident Ironic Health Animals Cats Love Airport Sex Intimacy Relationship advice Cheating

The Top

Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 676

You deserved it 7 123

Today, my boyfriend came over. We'd planned on losing out virginities today. What we didn't plan on was having my 9-year-old brother and his friends making a video of "What teens do when no one is home." They taped the whole thing, including the five minutes it took us to get the condom on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 965

You deserved it 931

The Top

Today, we had a school assembly at 7:00 pm about drinking and driving. There was a cop doing a demonstration of a field sobriety test on stage. I was randomly selected to perform a breathalyzer test in front of all the students and parents. I blew 0.06. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 038

You deserved it 102 888

Today, my biology teacher asked the class a question, so I raised my hand and after I gave my answer, my teacher said, "You know, you have a voice for radio. It's very deep." I replied with "Do I? Thanks!" He added, "You also have the face for radio." The whole class laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 307

You deserved it 578

Today, my little sister asked me to open a jar of pickles for her. I struggled a little until the lid busted open, and pickle juice poured over my pocket and the iPhone inside. My sister then sniffed the jar, made a disgusted face, and ran out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 849

You deserved it 3 844

Today, we sparred for Tae Kwon Do. I forgot my cup, but I didn't think anyone sucked enough to hit me below the belt. 5 seconds into a match, some girl knees me in the happy sacks. After writhing in pain for 30 seconds, I got back up to spar. I didn't think she sucked enough to do it again. She did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 040

You deserved it 31 033

Today, our class was focusing on discrimination, and our teacher asked us if anyone had ever felt discriminated against. I put my hand up to share a story, and my teacher immediately said "It's because you're ginger, isn't it?" That's not what I was going to say. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 468

You deserved it 7 646

Today, I took out a thief using my martial arts training. Everyone thanked me, even the police. My mom spent the rest of the day moaning that if I’d minded my own business, the thief would've been gone in two minutes, but thanks to me we had to waste an hour of her day off talking to the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 349

You deserved it 96