Miscellaneous Today, a cockroach fell from my ceiling when I was getting in... - FML

kentrm - 19/08/2016 17:43 - United States - Atlanta

Today, a cockroach fell from my ceiling when I was getting in bed. This was 10PM when it happened. When I turned on the lights, I couldn't find it. I ended up staying up until 12. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Dragon1248 12

Tuesday 23 August 2016 5:43

Burn it...

Dragon1248 12

Tuesday 23 August 2016 5:43

Burn it...

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML

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Today, I found out one of my exes is trans. I’m very happy for her, but I’m starting to think I have the wrong type, as I have had 3 ex-boyfriends come out as gay and 3 come out at trans right after breaking up. I really hope my current boyfriend doesn’t have a secret. FML

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Today, it's our ten-year anniversary, and I thought finally we would break our 10-month dry spell with some action. My husband had dozed off and was snoring even before I could reach the bed after finishing my chores. So much for happily ever after… FML

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Today, we had our busiest day at work all year with lots of angry people calling, and a co-worker called in sick. I went to my local game shop after work, exhausted and upset, and guess who was at his usual table running a Dungeons and Dragons group, apparently not too sick to go out. Yeah. FML

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Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about what we want to be when we grow up. He said he wanted to be a bartender, and single. FML

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Today, I was walking home, when I realized I didn't have my phone on me. After retracing my steps, I realized that I'd been listening to music from my phone the entire time. FML

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