Sex, Awkward Intimacy This is my O face - FML

This is my O face

lauz - 03/10/2009 12:20 - Australia

Today, I slept with my boyfriend for the first time. I'd always imagined it would be a romantic moment, but it turned out that "Saw 5" was on the TV in the background, and the sex was so fantastically tragic that I ended up watching/listening to it, on the sly. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Crazy nights

Ugh... - 20/07/2010 08:15 - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house. Expecting to get a little action, I was surprised to find that he had fallen asleep while I was showering. I spent my night watching television and browsing the internet while he snored. Loudly. FML

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Disinterested

lily - 13/09/2020 14:01 - United States

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I slightly opened my eyes during it and saw him with his eyes wide open, watching TV. FML

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Anonymous - 12/09/2015 20:50 - United Kingdom - Brentwood

Today, my boyfriend convinced me to face my fear of horror movies by promising to hold my hand through the entire flick. He fell asleep 10 minutes into it, farting and snoring in his sleep, whilst I was paralysed by fear. FML

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Anonymous - 04/04/2012 17:45 - Canada - Lethbridge

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when his sister knocked on the door and asked if she could borrow the zombie movie we were watching after we were done with it. We weren't watching a movie; I was just moaning. FML

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Sounds hot

oops999 - 19/11/2013 19:46 - United States - Downingtown

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno she once starred in. FML

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Moving

happyasaclam - 19/02/2009 00:55 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were hooking up while watching a movie. Just as I was getting really into it, he told me to move my head. He couldn't see the television. FML

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Spooky season special

Anonymous - 20/10/2023 16:00

Today, I was having a movie night with my significant other. I suggested a classic horror movie binge, and she agreed. However, as soon as the movie started, she fell asleep and started snoring louder than a chainsaw. It's hard to take scary movies seriously with the sounds of a chainsaw going on, I tell you. FML

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Anonymous - 21/09/2011 13:17 - United States

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend, and started to climb on top of him sexily. He blurted out, "Oh my god, you're like that girl from The Ring." FML

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Survivor!

Anonymous - 18/06/2013 16:16 - United States - Mansfield

Today, I was planning on having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, so I asked my roomate to stay out of our apartment. About half-way through, my roomate blared "The Eye of the Tiger" from the other side of the door. My girlfriend laughed so hard that we couldn't finish. FML

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That escalated badly

Anonymous - 19/03/2020 09:03

Today, a blowjob from my fiancée turned into exchanged oral, which turned into mutual masturbation while watching porn, which then turned into me being kicked out of the room because it was "weird" with me watching. FML

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doubleAbattery 0

Saturday 3 October 2009 22:05

This FML is worded horribly.

keywestlov 0

Saturday 3 October 2009 17:46

wow. horror movies and sex? i dont see what your complaining about! those are awesome things.

MiseryMan 0

Friday 9 October 2009 8:30

I guess the OP's boyfriend didn't have any **** to get things hot, so he had to manage with the next best thing.

Lifelooser_fml 0

Monday 12 October 2009 12:59

Thats just Aussie men. Try again.

Melephant_fml 0

Saturday 17 October 2009 18:59

My first time was while watching Super Troopers. First times are never romantic.

alexthedude 0

Tuesday 20 October 2009 1:08

for one a really cool movie. =D also its not an fml... like at all

mixxybee 0

Tuesday 29 December 2009 4:50

I can totally imagine that, lol right as you guys are getting it on you hear torture noises in the background XD

SoIcyKoolin 0

Sunday 18 July 2010 10:59

if you're 18, you shoulda hit me up

lovecraft93 0

Friday 15 October 2010 17:16

I lost my virginity while Beowulf was on.. it was great :P

hihowudern 0

Friday 1 April 2011 4:09

She is saying that the sex is so bad that she watched saw

kat815 0

Monday 16 May 2011 12:14

if a guy told me the sex was " fantastically tragica" i would be offened

Ressamies 6

Tuesday 8 November 2011 22:44

well, some of the reviewers described Saw as "torture ****" :D Saw is awesome tho.

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my boyfriend tickled me. In between laughs, I warned him that I was going to pee myself. He didn't believe me. After I actually did, he suggested we use a "safety word" from now on so that he will know when I'm being serious. FML

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Today, I wore my best suit to an interview. I was told they didn't have any knight shifts available. FML

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Today, it was my birthday and I have no children. My father bluntly says, "Well, I guess if I get any grand-babies out of you now, they will have Down's Syndrome." I just turned 30. FML

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Today, my thirteen-year-old daughter tried to scratch the freckles off of her face. We ended up going to the hospital. FML

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Today, my brother arrived at the cabin we’re staying at on a trip. He insisted he got the bed I chose. My father responded, "You wouldn’t want the bed if you knew what he did in it last night." I laughed until I realized there's a mirror where he could've easily seen "what I did last night." FML

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Today, my best friend and I were taking bikini selfies in my backyard hot tub when I caught my little brother peeping and taking photos from around a corner behind us. Now I know how he can afford his vapes, despite not having a job and being in middle school. FML

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