Birds Money The turkeys fight back - FML

The turkeys fight back

Anonymous - 12/04/2015 18:29 - United States - South Burlington

Today, I found out that turkeys can fly. I also found out how much a new windshield costs. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Clever

FMLTIMESTWO - 10/06/2009 04:36 - United States

Today, I found a dead bird on my windshield. Thinking I was clever, I turned on my windshield wipers to get the bird off. Unfortunately, the dead bird fell through my open window and onto my lap. FML

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andrea99 - 03/10/2010 09:35 - United States

Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML

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Shotgun

ferrarismyname - - United States

Today, I was sitting shotgun in the car. A huge bug came inside, and everyone began to freak out so naturally I began to swat at it. I got the fly, but I also cracked the windshield. I paid $229 to kill a bug. FML

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me. - 14/03/2012 15:19 - United States

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to drive my car through a flock of vultures eating road kill. Since a bird hit the mirror and broke it, I now have to pay for a replacement. FML

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Act of god

Anonymous - 05/04/2023 00:00

Today, I purchased a new car. On the drive home, gusts of wind blew up debris and pebbles and caused little chips in the paint and small chips on the windshield. FML

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How did you manage that?

Anonymous - 10/04/2009 14:35 - United States

Today, I was driving my car like any ordinary day. My dad had been harping on me about not checking the oil, so I finally checked it. Driving down the road my hood flew up and shattered my windshield. I forgot to latch my hood after checking the oil. $300 for a new windshield. The oil was fine. FML

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Look at that

That escalated quickly - 24/06/2015 19:45 - United States - Ocean City

Today, while driving to Nashville, I saw a bunch of wild turkeys huddled together on the side of the road. I was excited to point them out to my boyfriend, until I realized that the "wild turkeys" were in fact vultures, and that they were eating a dead deer. FML

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Irony at a base level

danyelicindereli - 29/05/2009 03:41 - United States

Today, I was standing around looking out the window at work when it became really dark and windy and started to pour. I watched a shopping cart fly across the parking lot thinking how funny it'd be if it hit someone's car. It hit mine. I need a new headlight. FML

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Anonymous - 11/04/2014 20:07 - Switzerland

Today, my father took me out for some driving lessons. Out of nowhere, a huge, apparently suicidal bird dove into the windshield, putting a crack in it. My father yelled at me as if it was my fault, and is demanding I pay for the repairs. FML

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Lindsey Taul - 22/12/2017 22:00 - United States - Granite City

Today, while driving home from work, I heard a loud crash immediately followed by the sound of wind and shifting glass over my head. My sunroof exploded for no perceptible reason 5 days before Christmas. FML

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AndyPurdy 31

Monday 13 April 2015 0:09

what the actual ****

gintwinsmoore 20

Monday 13 April 2015 0:10

were u driving that fast or was the turkey moving that slow???

HawaiiiLy 6

Monday 13 April 2015 3:32

Same thing happened to me not two days ago. I was in my dad's personal truck driving home from him getting his company truck. He was in front of me and we were on the interstate going 60 and then Whaam! a turkey hits my windshield. Busted the window and dented the roof. My dad wasn't happy and now he has to pay for a new windshield and we are down a vehicle for a week.

jgreer93 15

Monday 13 April 2015 3:35

What's sad, this is a regular occurrence where I'm from :( sorry OP

wanderer_alone 8

Monday 13 April 2015 3:43

Oh my god

Pigpig1234 10

Monday 13 April 2015 4:01

Meow

gobiteme2 34

Monday 13 April 2015 4:02

Evidently the turkey couldn’t fly high enough or fast enough. Hope your insurance covered it without any cost to you.

NodakN8V 25

Monday 13 April 2015 4:03

As avid turkey hunter ..yes they do fly and very well I might add...20 pound bird flying into a windshield makes for a bad day.

Jburky_10 15

Monday 13 April 2015 4:08

1 wild turkey - and strange shit can happen . . . and i dont just mean the bird!

Sneado 20

Monday 13 April 2015 4:09

I feel for you op. Had the same thing happen two weeks after I bought my new truck.

guyverfan 9

Monday 13 April 2015 4:47

Wild turkeys are actually quite skinny so I am not surprised.

Kurby14 21

Monday 13 April 2015 4:57

it's beginning! they want revenge for thanksgiving!

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I attended a party, thinking it was hosted by my friend. I showed up, mingled, had some drinks, and even played a couple of games. After about an hour, my friend called me and asked where I was. I'd crashed the wrong party. Everyone there was nice about it, but now I can never show my face there again. FML

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Today, I spent a lot of money buying a birthday gift for a close friend, only to find out I'm not even invited to the party. FML

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Today, I went to get a pedicure for the first time. My feet are VERY ticklish. I reflexively kicked the poor lady in the face, as I wet my pants. FML

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Today, I accidentally left my cell phone at the restaurant. When I realized my mistake, I went back to see if anyone had found it. They said no, so I gave them my number to call if it turned up. I realized later that I'd given them my cell phone number. FML

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Today, while riding the bus, I saw my ex-girlfriend get on. Despite several seats being open, she specifically sat next to me. I was at first happy, thinking she might want to make up. Nope, she instead blocked me in with her bag and spent the entire time showing me pictures of her new lover's dick. FML

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Today, I went to the courthouse to apply for my marriage license and had my mother tag along with me. When I asked one of five security guards where to go, my mom looked at him and said,"You’re suppose to talk her out of it." Thanks, Mom. FML

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