Intimacy Teaching moment

Teaching moment

ohno - 10/03/2010 11:05 - United States

Today, I went to see a movie with my best friend, and there were three girls loudly discussing blowjob techniques. I texted my boyfriend about how gross the conversation was. His reply was, "Pay attention. You might learn something." FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

aranya - 14/06/2012 22:51 - Netherlands - Hengevelde

Today, I went to see a movie with my girlfriend and a few others. Mid-way through, I noticed my girlfriend giving a hand-job to my best friend. I couldn't believe my eyes, and I confronted them. He claimed he had been asleep, she claimed she was mopping up a spill, and I'm now single again. FML

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Anonymous - 18/06/2011 15:43 - United States

Today, I went to the movies with my friend and two pretty girls. During the movie, he made out with both of them, while I sat there awkwardly and watched the movie. FML

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Subliminal message - 19/01/2014 23:21 - Switzerland

Today, my boyfriend started whispering "blowjobbbb" into my ear while we were watching a movie. When I asked him what he was doing, he denied ever saying it and claimed it must have been a subliminal message in the movie. FML

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In transit

Kens - 20/05/2009 00:51 - Canada

Today, I was on the bus home and on the phone with my best friend discussing my sex life with this new guy I'm seeing. I was telling her all sorts of raunchy sex things we've done until someone taps my shoulder and says "I'm sure he doesn't appreciate you saying this in public." It was his mom. FML

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HouseMdFangirl - 10/08/2009 06:12 - United States

Today, I went to the movies with my best friend. While waiting for it to start, I went on to describe this guy I really liked and how badly I wanted to do him. Just then the girl sitting behind us leans down and says "That's my little brother. So you're the creeper he talks about." FML

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Anonymous - 07/04/2015 21:00 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend repeatedly whispering in my ear, "You want to give me a blowjob". Yes, he actually thought it would work. FML

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The Wire

whorica139 - 02/09/2009 00:59 - United States

Today, I told my friend over videochat every explicit detail of what I had in store for my boyfriend later on in the day. I only realized afterwards that her whispering during the story was her way of trying to tell me her dad was in the room listening to the whole thing. FML

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I'm not the main character in this scene

Anonymous - 21/12/2023 00:00 - Norway

Today, I went to the movies with a girl I like, then we went to grab a bite afterwards. She spent most of the time telling me how much she dislikes my best friend because he hooked up with a new girl. I then found out the two had been "talking" for a while. FML

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Betrayal

frankfukhergood - 09/07/2009 05:49 - Canada

Today, I asked a buddy of mine if he wanted to go see a movie. He said he was busy, so I decided to go alone. Midway through, the couple behind me was making out and kicking my seat. I turned around, and it's my ex-girlfriend making out with my buddy. FML

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Shut up

anon - 04/05/2009 21:56 - United States

Today, I was sitting in a theater waiting for the movie to start when a hot guy sat next to me. Trying to impress him, I made seemingly witty comments to my friend throughout the movie. When it ended, he loudly complained to his friends about the 'annoying girl' sitting next to him. FML

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Fedor_is_KING 0

Wednesday 10 March 2010 16:04

Well, did you pick up any tips?

txdiva 0

Wednesday 10 March 2010 16:04

Did learn anything??!!!

sayntdavid 0

Wednesday 10 March 2010 18:01

shut up and learn

robdoggstge 0

Wednesday 10 March 2010 18:13

lol that's just funnt

mrguy266 0

Wednesday 10 March 2010 18:13

Seriously, when you are "pleasuring" your man, go for the balls..it feels amazing.

sugarbabyxoxo 2

Wednesday 10 March 2010 18:15

LOL your boyfriend is great

blazenfiji 0

Wednesday 10 March 2010 18:19

need to know

HahahaFiz 0

Wednesday 10 March 2010 18:51

ydi for having ears.

djavalanche 0

Wednesday 10 March 2010 18:54

lol, how does ur friend know u need practice?

howlinforyou 5

Wednesday 17 June 2015 10:00

She was at the theatre with her friend and texted her boyfriend.

buttonface 0

Wednesday 10 March 2010 18:55

Pay attention. If you're ugly, you're only as good as what you put out.

bumchum 0

Wednesday 10 March 2010 18:56

he's just trying to tell you that you aren't very good in a round about fashion XD deal with it. listen 2 tips and get better!

Simplyjulie 0

Wednesday 10 March 2010 19:06

lmfao wow... idiot..

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my mom overheard me telling my 6 year-old about periods. My mom condescendingly asked, “Isn’t she a bit young for that?” That’s pretty rich coming from a woman who didn’t want to share the TV, so all of us grew up watching whatever violent or raunchy sex filled R-rated crap she wanted to watch. FML

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Today, I went to visit a suburb that was named after my family. Within five minutes of walking around I was mugged and then beat up. My family name has certainly done well for itself. FML

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Today, I took a big sip of water while on a bus. It went down the wrong pipe, causing me to cough and hack loudly. The old woman sitting across from me asked if I was OK. Jokingly, I said, "Just dying." She replied, "You too, huh?" FML

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Today, I scratched my cornea and have to wear a large bandage covering my eye. I'm off today, but I'll probably have to wear it to school tomorrow. FML

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Today, my husband missed the toilet again. I would have been less disgusted if he'd peed this time. FML

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Today, I went to the doctor to check the dark growth I just discovered on my back. It was chocolate. FML

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