Sex, Awkward Intimacy Split second

Split second

FLIPmcCOOL - 15/05/2014 22:57 - Ireland - Cork

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. That name just happened to be "Sarah", which is both my ex-girlfriend's name and my wife's sister's name. When she asked me which one I meant, I panicked and said, "Both." FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Confusing love triangle

Perry85 - 04/01/2020 05:00

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I said the wrong name in bed. On top of that, it was the name of her ex-husband's ex-girlfriend. Who he cheated on my girlfriend with while they were together. FML

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Freud intensifies

Anonymous - 08/07/2021 22:01

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. An ex? A friend? A side guy? Nope, none of those. I called him “Dad”. FML

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scalmon - 13/05/2011 17:08 - United States

Today, while making love to my wife, I let slip her sister's name. I don't think it would calm her down much if I told the truth: I was actually thinking of an ex girlfriend who shares the same name. FML

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Anonymous - 01/10/2009 05:56 - Canada

Today, while I was getting it on with my girlfriend I accidentally called out "Mom" instead of her name. FML

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bg4545 - 24/03/2016 03:39 - United States - Whittier

Today, for some reason that is unknown to me, I accidentally referred to my girlfriend as "my ex-girlfriend." To her face. Needless to say, my statement became true afterwards. FML

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Memory man

Anonymous - 20/02/2017 22:00 - United States - Kennebunk

Today, my girlfriend and I were doing the dirty, when she told me to say her full name, including her middle name. I'd forgot her middle name. It was completely awkward after. I'm a dumbass. FML

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eeh - 07/05/2009 14:45 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML

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Freudian slip

Daria_Weiner - - Russian Federation

Today, at my anniversary party, and in front of all our friends, I accidentally called my husband-to-be by my ex-boyfriend's name. FML

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Sorry sweaty, my brain is melting

Anonymous - 03/07/2021 22:01

Today, while intoxicated, I accidentally called my girlfriend by female roommate's name. Panicked, I tried to correct myself and said my female best friend's name. My relationship with both is 100% platonic, but as a last ditch effort, completely frazzled, I said my cat's name. Now she won't stop calling me by her ex's name. FML

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thatsnotmyname - 03/07/2014 03:12 - United States - Calhoun City

Today, my boyfriend of a couple of weeks mixed up my name with his ex-wife's name. After he said it, he looked at me and said, "You knew it was going to happen." FML

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kcpestwick 15

Friday 16 May 2014 10:48

Should've had a Twix

maxii290594 8

Friday 16 May 2014 10:52

Wrong answer buddy , wrong answer ... You're screwed

dayavera 9

Saturday 17 May 2014 6:49

how could you make that mistake? its your fault for thinking about other people ...

juwannaman 11

Saturday 17 May 2014 9:38

You idot

geni310 10

Saturday 17 May 2014 15:32

Idiot

rob1848 3

Saturday 17 May 2014 19:56

How do you say the wrong name? Lmao..

Daxt3r 2

Sunday 18 May 2014 22:56

"I refuse to answer due to the fact that it may incriminate me".

DatWeirdoDoe 9

Monday 19 May 2014 4:35

Thats messed up

f0xr0t 8

Monday 19 May 2014 23:20

how? why would you think of either

honeybeeki 14

Tuesday 20 May 2014 5:16

Ya don goofed

tfisch16 9

Tuesday 20 May 2014 21:35

You're an idiot

mkayden 23

Tuesday 20 May 2014 23:32

You remind me of Kelso

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, while scrubbing my car with the foam brush at a car wash, the hose for the brush came whipping around and smacked me hard in the side of the head, knocking off my glasses. I got disoriented from the blow and stepped on my glasses, completely smashing them. FML

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Today, I woke up to my stomach being torn up from the inside. Barely made it to the bathroom, but of course, it wasn’t the one in my room, where I could easily change my clothes after a quick shower. After running down all my new meds, I realized it had to be my new sleep aid. It was helping too. FML

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Today, I had to walk through the women's perfume section to get to my normal aftershave. A woman was trying out a perfume, which she squirted on herself and me. You can imagine the afternoon I had to endure after I got home to my wife and she could smell "some slut's scent" all over me. FML

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Today, I slept on the plane ride home and had a scary nightmare. I started screaming in my dream, so loud that it shocked the old lady sitting next to me into screaming as well. The whole plane began laughing as we were both screaming. FML

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Today, I have a tattoo of my daughter, who died when she was 11, and I had to have surgery on that body area. I told the surgeon very clearly to cut around the tattoo and he assured me he would. Woke up and the bastard had cut through my daughter's face, and half her face is now under scars and stitches. FML

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Today, in the middle of an exam, I was escorted out by the campus police due to suspicion of a concealed weapon. The officers couldn't stop laughing for 20 minutes when they found out the weapon was metal knitting needles. FML

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