Transportation Someone thinks highly of themself - FML

Someone thinks highly of themself

ballerphilip23 - 15/05/2009 17:11 - Austria

Today, I was standing on the packed bus home when I had a speck of dust in my lenses. As I couldn't rub it out, I tried blinking it out for the next five minutes. Then the hot girl opposite me screamed, "Stop winking at me, don't even think about it you ugly fuck!" FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

mhm - 06/05/2012 02:21 - Canada - Woodbridge

Today, on the bus, I caught the eye of this ugly, sweaty girl giving me a death stare through the driver's mirror. I gave her a death stare back. Only then I realized I was staring at myself. FML

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WTF? FML!

ricky the sage - 05/10/2013 00:04 - United Kingdom - Coventry

Today, I was on the bus, heading to work, when the girl beside me started yelling at me, claiming I was staring down her shirt. I did no such thing, but the driver nonetheless stopped the bus and made me get off, all under the withering glares of the other passengers. FML

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apparentlyawomanbeater - 20/04/2012 21:48 - Switzerland - Cadempino

Today, I was on the bus during rush hour. A fly started buzzing around my head, and I swatted at it, at the exact moment the woman beside me decided to get out of her seat and put her face straight in the path of my hand. FML

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mitchellcrawford - 31/05/2016 18:05 - United States - San Francisco

Today, after seeing a cute girl on the bus, I tried to look cool by flipping my hair, only to smack the side of my head into the bus window. FML

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Gross

clips - 16/02/2011 21:08 - United States

Today, I was on the bus. I heard a click right before something small hit my cheek. I looked over to see the lady next to me cutting her long, dirty fingernails. The bus was too crowded to move and It was a 20 minute ride to work. FML

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Anonymous - 10/02/2011 23:32 - United States

Today, I was on the bus heading home from school, when I noticed a ridiculously hot girl near me, checking me out. I was about to say something charmingly funny when I suddenly got a whiff of onions. Turns out she had turned around simply to catch the essence of her own fart. FML

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Suggestion

living in the ugly treehouse - 14/02/2016 11:23 - Australia

Today, while taking the bus home, a girl stared at me for a while before asking me if I'd ever heard of makeup. FML

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Anonymous - 26/11/2009 05:15 - Canada

Today, I was riding on my usual bus, when I noticed a man staring at me. I was having a really bad day, and said "Can you please stop staring at me?" He then replied with "I'm just trying to look out the window, and your head is in the way. Don't flatter yourself." FML

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neoteck - 08/01/2009 07:55 - France

Today, I was talking to a charming young lady on MSN by webcam. She suddenly asked me to take my glasses off for a minute; I did so, and she said, "Oh never mind, you're still just as ugly..." FML

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wench - 23/12/2010 20:39 - United States

Today, while driving, I idly started picking my nose. I looked over at the car next to me and saw a smoking hot guy from my school staring at me in disgust. He kept staring until I took a turn-off. FML

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fedora_fan13 0

Saturday 16 May 2009 1:39

someone's a self-centered, hard-to-believe-she-can-still-walk, skanky bitch...sorry something similar happened to me

genius_man16 0

Saturday 16 May 2009 1:58

Shoulda slapped a ho.

bunnybean12321 18

Monday 23 March 2015 10:58

"dont flatter yourself princess, my eye is bothered, probably by your shitty attitude"

fantasyworld 37

Tuesday 28 April 2015 15:30

Tell her "Don't flatter yourself hun".

PopBlox 14

Tuesday 24 November 2015 1:49

Should've pretended it was a disorder and made her feel bad

visej1122 9

Friday 8 July 2016 12:18

so what happened next. .I hope she gets karma for being a stuck up

chessdude 8

Monday 29 August 2016 23:13

Bitches be crazy

stfuwtf 21

Tuesday 4 October 2016 16:04

She's a bit full of herself.

KJ6 21

Sunday 9 October 2016 0:58

"Don't flatter yourself you stupid twat! I have something in my eye, and not every f'ing thing is about you!" And scene.

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I worked up the courage to tell my supervisor that it makes me feel uncomfortable when my coworker teases me by saying a special needs client is in love with me at the residential facility I work at. Her response was, “Well, he is obsessed with you. He writes your name down hundreds of times and watches you out his window." FML

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Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, he pulled up his pants and said, "There you go." FML

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Today, I walked in the bathroom to find my son cleaning his penis. It wouldn't have been so bad if he wasn't cleaning it with a toothbrush. FML

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Today, my best friend got engaged. I would be happy for her, if it wasn’t for the fact that her fiancé was my boyfriend just 2 months ago. Upon hearing the news, I severed all ties with her. She ended up bitching me out and calling me selfish for being upset. FML

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Today, I broke up with my fiancé after he cheated on me, and he now refuses to move out of the apartment. I'm even contemplating just offering him my Xbox One as a bribe so I can get him out of my life for good. FML

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Today, I’m realising that at some point I should have just settled for the guys who were there, instead of waiting for the fantasy perfect guy. All my exes are happily married with grown kids, whereas I’m in my 50’s, never married, no kids or grandkids, and will probably die alone with my cat eating my face. FML

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