Animals Psssssych!

Psssssych!

Welcome to Florida - 20/07/2017 13:01

Today, my son's glasses were missing. My bathroom is not well lit, but I noticed something sticking out from under the toilet seat. I excitedly grabbed it, thinking I saw the band of the glasses. Nope, it was a snake. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Lurker

Katie - 20/02/2011 08:35 - Reserved

Today, I woke up to an angry snake trying to climb the leg of my bed. My bedroom was closed all day yesterday. It must have gotten in my room days ago. FML

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Anonymous - 03/06/2015 01:34 - United States - West Chester

Today, my mother found my escaped pet snake after she had already washed and dried it with the laundry. FML

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Snek

afraidtosleep - 13/10/2012 06:35 - United States - Houston

Today, as I was rushing to get out for work, I opened my door just in time to witness a large snake slither into my home. I had no choice but to lock it inside and go to work. I've now spent several hours searching for it with my friends, and we can't find it. I'm scared to go to sleep. FML

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Tim - 07/08/2011 02:49 - United States

Today, I found that there is nothing worse than coming home to a snake slithering across your kitchen floor. Except when it disappears into your cabinets. FML

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seriousdubsteplover - 30/10/2009 05:08 - Australia

Today, when going to fill up the kettle, I noticed a bad smell and pieces of something coming out of the tap. Turns out there was a dead snake in my water supply. FML

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bad luck Bianca - 17/01/2015 22:30 - United States - Houston

Today, I saw a stick in my car and picked it up to throw it out the window. The "stick" turned out to have eyes. It was a dead lizard. FML

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fEk - 22/03/2019 09:00 - Australia

Today, I couldn't find my reading glasses, thinking perhaps i'd dropped them outside, I stepped off my deck bare foot, straight into a steaming dog turd. Only to see my glasses chewed up a few feet away. It went between my toes. FML

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Not on a plane

Surewhatever - 16/10/2019 14:01

Today, when I warned my guests to check the toilet for snakes, I meant it. FML

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olive_costume - 05/12/2009 01:16 - Australia

Today, I went into my room and found a plastic snake on the floor. I yelled out to my sister, "Good one, Ellen!" I picked up the snake to take it to show her. The snake started moving in my hands and bit me. I had to go to the hospital. FML

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vegantreegirl - 04/02/2019 20:00

Today, I was using the restroom at work when my glasses slipped off my face and landed right in the toilet. FML

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Lobby_Bee 17

Thursday 20 July 2017 13:32

Snake - Today, I was chilling by the pool and all of a sudden, some perverted human being grabbed my ass. FML

egnur_mas 19

Thursday 20 July 2017 13:34

Rookie error, don't grab anything from the toilet in a dark room!

Lobby_Bee 17

Thursday 20 July 2017 13:32

Snake - Today, I was chilling by the pool and all of a sudden, some perverted human being grabbed my ass. FML

egnur_mas 19

Thursday 20 July 2017 13:34

Rookie error, don't grab anything from the toilet in a dark room!

ariege09 1

Thursday 20 July 2017 14:44

Your own glasses must be missing too!

Glowworm56 26

Thursday 20 July 2017 16:14

You have a literal plumber's snake.

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 20 July 2017 16:26

Train the snake to hold two lenses while wrapped around your son’s head. He’ll have the coolest glasses in school! Make sure the snake isn’t a constrictor.

Glowworm56 26

Thursday 20 July 2017 16:42

If the snake is a constrictor, it will keep your son's glasses on nice and tight and he won't lose them!

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 20 July 2017 18:21

That’ll work until it doesn’t.

Mooglefox 23

Thursday 20 July 2017 19:42

First you must ask yourself: where did this snake come from?

Savannah Nicole Lee 4

Sunday 23 July 2017 7:04

It's Florida, it probably pays rent there.

Surewhatever 35

Tuesday 25 July 2017 4:55

Yes, yes. That is the scariest part of this FML.

Talented73 54

Thursday 20 July 2017 20:40

I have a snake.... in my pants.... huh-huh.... huh-huh-huh....

Spencer William Ferguson 4

Thursday 20 July 2017 21:34

full of shit xD

corky1992 33

Thursday 20 July 2017 21:41

why would you think something under the toilet seat was your glasses? you said the room wasnt well lit, but of ALL places you thought your glasses were there? lol. yikes about the snake.