Miscellaneous Proud dad

Proud dad

Anonymous - 03/11/2010 01:49 - United States

Today, I was playing my bass clarinet around the house. I asked my dad if he would be at my concert on December 16th. His response was, "No, I'm working that day." My dad is a plumber, and gets called to work completely at random; he has no schedule. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
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Kristinmarsh08 - 29/10/2010 12:02 - United States

Today, I texted my dad and told him I was getting married in five months. His reply? "I gotta work that day." FML

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allinicolesmh - 08/08/2011 16:03 - United States

Today, my dad said he can't go to my graduation because he has to work. He got fired a month ago. FML

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.... - 30/11/2014 04:29 - United States - Geneva

Today, my boyfriend went to work instead of going to my father's funeral. He works at home and chooses his own hours. FML

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Priorities

karina17 - 18/10/2009 05:03 - Canada

Today, my dad was supposed to come see me for our twice-a-year visit. He was 3 hours late. So I called, and asked him why he was late. He said, "Oh, something came up." I asked him what was so important. Apparently, the garage needed cleaning. FML

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Anonymous - 24/02/2011 10:34 - United States

Today, I asked my dad what his plans for Friday were. Apparently, he's going to a concert with my step-mom all evening. It's been their plan for months. Friday is my birthday. That's been set since the day I was born. FML

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Anonymous - 09/12/2014 21:14 - United States - Margate City

Today, as I was leaving home for my mall kiosk job, my dad asked me where I was off to. When I said I was going to work, he tossed an empty beer bottle to the floor, belched, and said "Bah! Get a REAL job!" He's unemployed and living in my apartment. FML

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Ruby Lore - 20/07/2017 00:31

Today, I asked my dad if he'd like to go fishing together, but he said he was busy with errands. Later, in a casual conversation with my friend, she opened up her phone to show me pictures of her fishing with my dad. FML

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Planning

holly - 18/07/2010 14:18 - Germany

Today, I was practising the violin in my apartment. A man knocked on the door and introduced himself with a smile, saying he wanted to know my "schedule." I replied, "I'm pretty busy but maybe we could get a drink sometime." To which he replied, "No, I just want to know when you'll stop." FML

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Shark-infested offices

Anonymous - 23/08/2020 20:01

Today, I attended my father’s funeral. I have the week off work, and one of my colleagues is using this time to make a play for my job. I’m not supposed to be checking emails, so I can’t call them out on it until I get back, by which time it may be too late. FML

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Not on the weekend

jtaylor94 - - Canada

Today, my dad's boss called our house and I answered. He said, "Is your dad home?" I replied, "I'll go check." I put the phone on mute and asked my dad if he wanted to talk to his boss. My dad says, "Does that asshole not have a life?" Turns out the phone wasn't on mute, it was on speaker. FML

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ambowew 7

Wednesday 3 November 2010 9:09

Time to crack that bass out and practice in the middle of the night. He might learn to appreciate it then.

El_Mero_Mero 0

Wednesday 3 November 2010 9:14

cut him some slack. he says he's a plumber but when bowser comes and kidnaps princess peach. he has to go recuse her. tell your uncle he never does anything anyways but pretend to do something.

stevenmx86 7

Wednesday 3 November 2010 12:07

Plumbers make appointments too... Just because you're too dumb to understand how his business works doesn't mean he doesn't have a schedule...

77taylah33 0

Wednesday 3 November 2010 12:16

hahah lol^

FingerMyElmo 0

Wednesday 3 November 2010 12:19

maybe you should stop blowing homie you already suck.HEH HEH HEHA

elkayshmay 0

Wednesday 3 November 2010 12:32

YA BABY!!bass<3 <3

Terpaxsten 0

Wednesday 3 November 2010 12:42

My dad builds houses. When it comes to the plumbing, he hires a PLUMBER to take a few days off to work when my dad asks him to. And those are the days plumbers make more than last month combined OP. He may be working hard for you to even have a bass clarinet.