Sex Intimacy Parental advice

Parental advice

ifeeldirty - 27/10/2011 12:22 - United States

Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML

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Bear - 01/02/2009 17:38 - United Kingdom

Today, I walked in on my Mum and Dad having sex and didn't even realize what they were doing until she shouted at him to go harder. FML

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Anonymous - 10/09/2011 06:35 - United States

Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML

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GoldenTornado11 - 10/05/2017 14:00

Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML

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Anonymous - 01/03/2011 16:21 - United States

Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML

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Excuse me

Anonymous - 30/03/2015 10:30 - United States - Cincinnati

Today, my parents walked in on me, having sex. No, I wasn't having sex. They were. FML

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Anonymous - 04/03/2010 10:06 - United States

Today, my mom walked in on me and my boyfriend having sex. She was completely embarrassed (as was I) and she flew out of the room. My boyfriend, on the other hand, still wanted to finish. FML

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kill me - 30/09/2018 03:00

Today, my dad overheard me and my girlfriend having a very personal conversation. His response was to burst into the room and ground me for a month for failing to get her to orgasm the last 3 times we had sex. FML

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Weird family

Veronica - 29/12/2022 09:00 - United States - Allentown

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. His mom didn’t know much about it, and she walked in on us. After about 5 minutes she came back up, threw a box of condoms at us, says, "Continue" and walked out. We were still fucking while she was in the room. FML

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Keith walk - 12/02/2011 05:59 - United States

Today, my girlfriend's parents walked in on us having sex. Not only did her dad make me walk out to my truck with no clothes on, he is my baseball coach and I will be seeing him on Monday. FML

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Didn't see you there

eatmyshipoopie - 18/12/2009 15:20 - United Kingdom

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend when my dad opened the door. I thought I hadn't been seen because the door was only open a tiny bit. I then looked into the mirror by the door to see my dad's reflection, staring at mine, horrified. I was on top. FML

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TheAznEagle 0

Thursday 27 October 2011 14:53

Daddy knows best!

Tyger44 1

Thursday 27 October 2011 14:53

Always listen to your father.

scr_sensei 14

Friday 28 October 2011 22:42

Cool dad is cool.

lulzmylife 4

Friday 28 October 2011 23:07

Hope you took his advice if you don't want your girlfriend to dump you for someone who's better in bed.

bubo_fml 10

Saturday 29 October 2011 1:53

Be glad he didn't say, "Step aside, Son! Never send a boy to do a man's job!"

aliceb2255 0

Sunday 30 October 2011 16:33

AHHHH ! That's great !

auddylynne 0

Monday 31 October 2011 5:42

Bahaha! That's funny lol it could have been worse?? I guess lol

TheDorianMode 8

Monday 31 October 2011 7:33

Bwahahahaha. That's great.

Krazii98 4

Wednesday 9 November 2011 4:07

this is the funniest FML i have seen ahahah

icic6772 0

Sunday 13 November 2011 15:22

Sidling?

manichimon 2

Wednesday 30 November 2011 15:40

******* girlfriends builds character.

MaryPoppins88 14

Wednesday 14 December 2011 15:22

You can do it! Put some back into it!

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Today, I pissed my pants in fear for the first time. Was I at a spooky haunted house? Nope, I turned a corner and got startled by a parked car. FML

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Today, my two boys wanted to sleep in bed with us. My wife gave them the okay, even though there’s not enough room for all of us to lay. I’m now sleeping in my 3 year-old’s bed. FML

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Today, my psycho ex is threatening to take me to court on child abuse allegations. How did I abuse them? I “gendered” our children by buying them certain colored clothing and toys... that they’d asked for. FML

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Today, I noticed that the glasses I got this week seemed off balance. A further inspection showed that one of my ears is bigger than the other. Through even further inspection, my family concluded that the entire right side of my body is higher than my left. FML

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Today, I told my ultra-Catholic mother that I was hanging out with a girl. While walking out of the flat, I didn't realize that I'd dropped one of my condoms out of my pocket. My mother saw it and ripped it apart, then yelled at me that, "Sex is for having children! You're giving yourselves to Satan!" I'm 20. FML

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Today, I told my mom that my boyfriend, who I've been living with for a year, and I were moving to another state at the end of the month. I told her in a restaurant, over lunch, where she then just got up and left me there without saying a word. FML

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