Intimacy Observation

Observation

Anonymous - 17/04/2009 05:43 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Right as I was really getting into it, he pauses, frowns, and says, "I think I see the pee hole." FML

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miiiiilk - 05/12/2010 11:12 - United States

Today, as my boyfriend was about to go down on me, he held his breath and said, "I'm going in!" FML

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thisblows - 16/03/2011 16:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. I started to moan right when I was about to climax. He got worried, stopped and asked, "Are you okay?!" FML

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Anonymous - 29/06/2010 17:34 - Canada

Today, after going down on my boyfriend, we were cuddling and I went to kiss him. Just before I could reach his lips, he ran his finger over my mouth and whispered, "S-s-s-semen." FML

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BarbieKen - 14/06/2009 04:14 - United States

Today, as my boyfriend and I were messing around in his room he took off my underwear. As he was about to go down on me I spread my legs to help out then he looked up at me and said, "You got some toilet paper left behind." FML

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anonymous - 04/11/2014 12:03 - Canada - North Vancouver

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob. I was laying in between his legs because it's just more comfortable. I looked down, and he had pieces of toilet paper sticking out of his butt cheeks. FML

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Anonymous - 30/09/2012 23:02 - United States - Rocky Point

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend doggy-style. I was getting close when he suddenly blurts out, "Babe, you really need to bleach your asshole." FML

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TooShortToCleanThat - 20/03/2015 03:22 - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided to show off one of his favorite skills: Peeing on my ceiling. FML

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Anonymous - 07/06/2016 07:45

Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom and proudly showed me how far back he could stand from the toilet while he peed. Unfortunately, he got distracted and peed all over the floor I had mopped just an hour before. FML

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Anonymous - 07/12/2011 17:47 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky. He pulled off my panties and was about to go down on me when he said, "Wait, what's this white thing?" It was a piece of toilet paper. FML

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Anonymous - 19/01/2016 11:03 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML

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AWESOM_E 0

Friday 17 April 2009 12:03

I wonder what he expected to see instead...?

hidude12 0

Friday 17 April 2009 12:03

woah anatomy... did he skip out on 4th grade health?

kelseymarie 0

Friday 17 April 2009 22:42

hahahaha okay agreed, not an fml, but still super funny... heehee... pee hole. ask him to find your poo hole next.

ATH3NA_fml 0

Friday 17 April 2009 23:08

Lemme guess, he's 12?

jdb2009 0

Friday 17 April 2009 23:09

LOL, kids. Amateurs.

nightngale 0

Friday 17 April 2009 23:14

If he refers to your urethra as your "pee hole" you're too young to be having sex. My opinion.

nina_fml 0

Friday 17 April 2009 23:17

Uh...tell him you can see his pee hole too? If he doesn't understand basic anatomy, perhaps he should learn before you two continue to have sex.

Art_Vandeley 0

Friday 17 April 2009 23:31

LOL I dod that too the first time i was going down on her. XD

kkkristennnn 0

Friday 17 April 2009 23:33

hahaha i think thats hilarious

mothfather 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 0:13

LMAO. Haha, I would of laughed and kicked him off of me. xD That's funny though.

justdance45 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 0:15

haha 64 xD he's so clueless

katezzz 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 0:23

Hahahahah, WOW!

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Today, I would like to say I pinched a nerve throwing punches, but no, I did it by sneezing. FML

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Today, after months of hardcore flirting with this incredibly attractive guy, he invited me to hang out. At which point he introduced me to his boyfriend. FML

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Today, I have to clear up after an orgy from last night. That would be bad enough, but I spent weeks arranging it, supplied the venue and everything else, and I was the only guy not to get laid. FML

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Today, I was using a public restroom. As I lowered my pants, a man's head and arms popped out over the divider. He took a picture and immediately rushed out. FML

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Today, I was at my boyfriend's house for dinner with his family. His mom cooked up a steak dinner, except that I'm a vegan, but trying to be a good girlfriend, I forced it down. Upon his mother finding out I was a vegan, she called me "disloyal to my beliefs." FML

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Today, I returned to work after a restful week-long holiday. Before I left, I'd finished a huge assignment which is due this week. I walk in to find a water pipe has burst just above my desk, flooding our office with water and ruining my computer. Happy New Year to me. FML

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