Love Not now, Kevin

Not now, Kevin

Noname - 16/01/2009 17:31 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend struck up a conversation about the reproductive systems of seahorses. We were getting intimate at the time. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Krissy - 25/01/2010 08:36 - United States

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend on the back bumper of my car. After he finished he told me he felt like he was riding a seahorse. FML

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shopper242 - 22/11/2010 12:29 - France

Today, my boyfriend compared my orgasm to that of a beached sea turtle. He demonstrated what he meant in front of all our friends. FML

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journey_Jeanne - 08/12/2011 02:31 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend I was ovulating. He said he didn't want to have sex because he was afraid of getting eggs on his penis. He then compared it to having sex with a fish. FML

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CALIdime_15 - 05/05/2012 05:42 - United States

Today, I watched my boyfriend have a full on conversation with his penis. He also talks to his penis nicer than he talks to me. FML

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fledermausi - 12/06/2012 13:02 - Hungary - Budapest

Today, I came home to my boyfriend emptying his bowels into my aquarium. FML

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Anonymous - 28/11/2009 05:25 - United States

Today, I was explaining the inner parts of a vagina and how they work. To my boyfriend. FML

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Anonymous - 06/06/2009 17:38 - United States

Today, my boyfriend went to the aquarium. We were noticing the fishy smell, and I had made a comment about it. Then my boyfriend slowly, and seductively whispers into my ear, "It sort of reminds me of how you smell." FML

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Sexy catboys rule my life

verno02 - 10/08/2010 23:58 - Canada

Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He's the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML

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lucy - 03/03/2009 05:55 - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me what I enjoyed most about the weekend we'd spent together. I mention in detail a certain move he had pulled when we made love. When asked what he enjoyed most, he replies "putting my fish tank together". FML

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Booktok

eakthegeek - - United States

Today, I was sexing it up with my boyfriend. Halfway through, he looked at me and said, "Y'know what you never see in a porno? Intellectual conversation. Read any good books lately?" He wouldn't keep going until I answered. FML

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Timmytwofinger 0

Thursday 5 February 2009 2:19

were you ******* David Attenborough by any chance?

iamireland 1

Tuesday 16 March 2010 22:10

The fact that he can even THINK about male-birth while having sex with you is a sign that he's a keeper.

Timmytwofinger 0

Thursday 5 February 2009 2:19

were you ******* David Attenborough by any chance?

naehappening 0

Wednesday 5 August 2009 23:12

hilarious! :D also... i love seahorses. i might almost enjoy a chat about them mid intercourse

maiden_girl 5

Sunday 15 February 2009 13:22

LOL! At least he didn't yell someone else's name... right? Haha.

claireful 4

Tuesday 3 May 2011 7:39

unless he named the seahorse...

lucidity 0

Monday 2 March 2009 0:01

but...that's awesome! I have those kinds of conversations with my boyfriend all the time.

JeanNe91 0

Wednesday 4 March 2009 23:51

haha, one time as i was having sex with a guy, we were talking about disney characters. lmao.

j_e_m_8_8 0

Friday 6 March 2009 8:23

#12..while having sex?!

jim_witness 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 20:45

Hmm...do you have a big nose?? were you watching the Oprah about the pregnant man?? Is his last name Costeau??

leadninja 0

Monday 16 March 2009 6:08

doesnt that mean he would have to be pregnant?

diet_cocaine 0

Friday 20 March 2009 7:01

well ur bf sounds like a functioning retard

randomcharacters 0

Friday 3 April 2009 5:33

Ahaha a talker.. At least the sex will never be boring, it will be a welcome break from all the talking.

apathetic 0

Sunday 5 April 2009 16:50

sounds like you're dating a nerd. awesome.

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I noticed that my two cats have been urinating on my Christmas tree skirt more frequently than in their litter box. I've tried to get them to stop, but I don't know how. FML

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Today, I had to ask one of my coworkers if we were supposed to return a client's teeth to her. I work at a jewellery store. FML

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Today, I had a meeting with HR that resulted in me being dismissed for poor performance. I was confused because up until that point, my line manager had said my performance was exemplary. Turns out it wasn't, and he didn't tell me because he didn't want me to be stressed. FML

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Today, I had sex for the first time with a guy. After he passionately made love to me, I turned to him and said, "You smell really good." He turned to me and said, "You don't." FML

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Today, I was pooping at a local Target when I heard someone say, "You need to eat more solids, you're pooping like a rabbit." FML

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Today, I had to crown the homecoming queen, a responsibility of mine as class president. It just happened to be that the queen is my ex-girlfriend that I still love, escorted by her new boyfriend. FML

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