Intimacy Make it rain

Make it rain

howler - 15/02/2011 06:44 - United States

Today, my mother walked in on me rubbing $400 in $20 bills all over myself. FML

12 308

64 772

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

gas money - 22/11/2015 04:34 - United States - Reno

Today, I found $100 on the ground. My mom is taking $40 because she was there. FML

25 871

3 505

Addict

Anonymous - 23/09/2013 02:56 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my mother asked me if she could borrow $200. Being the lovely daughter I am, I gave her my bank card to withdraw it herself. She gambled it away and maxed my bank account out. I had $1500 saved. FML

45 786

20 890

Anonymous - 07/05/2016 01:40 - United States - Walnut

Today, I walked in on my mom in the bathroom, washing a dildo. FML

17 324

2 461

SilverAuthor - 29/07/2016 22:53 - United States - Detroit

Today, I slipped money into my mother's purse after she refused to let me pay for lunch. She caught me in the act and thought I was stealing money from her instead. FML

15 369

2 079

Kinky

Keesha - 18/03/2021 19:30 - United States - Loveland

Today, my mother bitched at me for spending $200 on a new clothes I needed for my new job as a bank teller. I then received a notification on my phone that my mother's lingerie order was shipped. She spent $800 on teddies and crotchless panties. FML

1 189

Anonymous - 14/09/2012 05:28 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I walked in on my mother rubbing one out. For the third time. I then had to explain to her, also for the third time, why pleasuring herself in the living room is inappropriate. FML

42 137

2 801

How could you?

Anonymous - 29/03/2024 10:00 - United States

Today, my mom walked in on me jerking it in her bathroom. I'm a 40 year-old man and she's 68. FML

212

926

Isabell - 06/02/2010 05:31 - Australia

Today, my soon-to-be mother-in-law walked in on me masturbating, in my own house. FML

23 810

5 880

ikungfuyou - 27/12/2011 07:11 - United States

Today, despite being 21 years old and living in my own place, my mom still managed to walk in on me whacking off. FML

42 759

10 256

Anonymous - 21/04/2009 18:12 - United States

Today, I was running the register at my work and this big lady pulls her wad of cash out of her bra and hands it to me. The bills she handed me were moist. FML

82 309

3 869

x_Cupcakes 0

Tuesday 15 February 2011 12:08

lol. Next time you want to do something weird, lock the door.

hideyoself 4

Tuesday 15 February 2011 12:06

You cheep bastard

gypsyblue 0

Wednesday 16 February 2011 0:43

Unless it was below the waist, I'm not sure why it's in intimacy...

BigBoi2187 0

Wednesday 16 February 2011 1:51

NICE! Some dirty money!

jonny2x4 0

Wednesday 16 February 2011 3:13

i guess prostitution really does pay.

johnnie254 7

Wednesday 16 February 2011 4:00

makin love to the money!

epic13 12

Wednesday 16 February 2011 4:02

Congratulations! You now have AIDS!

fothermuckeremma 0

Wednesday 16 February 2011 4:16

**** your MOM's life.

FMLandurstoo 9

Wednesday 16 February 2011 4:40

why isn't this video on the internet

Lulabutt22 0

Wednesday 16 February 2011 5:09

Wow, that's weird and very gross!

Yousuck24 21

Wednesday 16 February 2011 5:13

I would be an FML if the money went into the fan.

bracara 0

Wednesday 16 February 2011 5:53

lol, thats dirty. Think about other strangers who might have been rubbing that same money all over their bodies :S

Miscellaneous My ex Stalker Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my wife tried to be sexy by climbing on top of me wearing nothing but a thong. Unfortunately, her knee came down in just the wrong spot and I passed out instantly from the pain of my testicle rupturing. I'm in hospital now recovering from the removal surgery. FML

5 017

265

Today, I jokingly mocked my dad about his age. He jokingly poured milk all over my head. FML

13 928

35 976

Today, I had an epic, two-hour conversation with a brilliant, beautiful future leader of our industry. She's an intern. I'm just some loser horndog of a senior manager in another department. FML

111

567

Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML

54 567

10 069

Today, I decided to be productive and work from a coffee shop. Just as I was about to talk to my boss on a video conference call, the barista shouted, "Latte for Batman!" FML

140

783

Today, I had to listen to my brother whine yet again about being single and how unfair it is. This is a guy who owns an "I fuck on the first date" t-shirt and has more than once referred to women as "vaginas with a person attached". Last time I called him out for being such a dick, I got punched. FML

27 176

1 945