Animals, Painful Kids Little demon

Little demon

Hackmanjones - 13/06/2009 14:42 - Canada

Today, I was volunteering at a zoo event for special needs kids. My job was to dress up in a kangaroo costume and greet the kids. One kid came up and said, "You're not real!" and kicked me in the nuts. FML

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bbbkingsey - 23/07/2009 07:10 - United States

Today, while walking through the park, a little boy came running up to me and hit me in the nuts with a stick. I fell on the ground and looked up just in time to see his mom giving him the thumbs up with a smile on her face. FML

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jessica - 17/02/2009 23:56 - United States

Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML

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LennyComa - 19/03/2017 00:00

Today, I was punched in the balls by a monkey. FML

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Make it stop!

Anonymous - 21/04/2024 21:00 - Ireland - Navan

Today, I volunteered to sit in stocks at a fair. Lots of kids pulled off my shoes and socks and tickled my feet for several minutes. I was laughing so hard there were tears. FML

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Greg - 16/12/2018 13:30

Today, I arrived to apply for my much-needed dream job. Without warning, just as the elevator opened, a complete stranger kicked me square in the nads. FML

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Exhaustion

Shell - 05/03/2009 07:14 - United States

Today, I was working at Chuck-E-Cheese. If that isn't enough, I was put in the mouse costume. Due to the disgusting hot smell and atmosphere in the costume, I fainted in front of a birthday party. I awoke to a little boy screaming who then kicked me in the face and ran. FML

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Shitty day - 24/05/2016 05:59 - United States - Agoura Hills

Today, while explaining to a group of kids that monkeys are very intelligent creatures, one of them flung poo in my face. FML

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Anonymous - 15/11/2010 07:26

Today, I volunteered to help out at an elementary school. I accidentally elbowed a little girl in the face while playing tag. And an hour later, a little boy flew out of his swing because I accidentally pushed him too hard. They're both siblings and are my child psychology instructor's kids. FML

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Annoymous - 03/09/2009 10:19 - Australia

Today, walking home from work, I saw a little boy crying, so I crouched down to his eye level. I asked him what was wrong, his reply was to kick me in the groin. FML

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PlsForget - 18/08/2016 21:47 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I was volunteering at a neighborhood house tutoring a bunch of kids. Everything was going fine until one of them jumped on the table I was at, which broke and hit my knee. I swore in front of all the kids and my volunteer coordinator. FML

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anonymousjason 0

Friday 19 June 2009 7:57

You're a woman and you have balls. Your L is F'd.

joecoyote 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 20:20

well at least he knows you weren't real lol thats a smart "slow" kid =P

easylazy 0

Tuesday 16 June 2009 2:31

BART SIMPSON!!!!!!!!!

i8anfml 0

Tuesday 16 June 2009 4:30

hey, he was right.

grocky 0

Wednesday 17 June 2009 0:57

Um, you aren't a woman obviously if you have been "kicked in the balls".

skiz_fml 0

Wednesday 17 June 2009 12:26

Thats what I thought, tho I think He probly made a mistake, but how can a little kid kick that high?

skiz_fml 0

Wednesday 17 June 2009 12:33

Oops, I read the FML wrong. Yeah I get how the kid could have kicked that high

nolove_16 0

Wednesday 17 June 2009 22:02

uh, it says you're a "woman" but you got kicked in the balls?

cwl727 32

Saturday 22 March 2014 0:07

I was wondering when somebody was going to mention that.

Hansongirl 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 9:00

Wait I'm confused...it says your a woman next to your screename so call me crazy but how do you have balls?

shoegal808 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 6:44

FYL. You're a woman. With balls.

lol_lmao 0

Wednesday 24 June 2009 4:14

LMFAO

Protegas 0

Wednesday 24 June 2009 4:28

Hm... Shoulda kicked him back :P

ziqi92 0

Tuesday 30 June 2009 3:11

a real kangaroo would have kicked the kid first...to the ground

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I was looking at the page of a girl I've had this big crush on for a long time. After getting a date with her and taking her horse back riding and having a picture taken of the two of us I find that she paint shopped me out of the picture before posting it. FML

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Today, I was in a public restroom with my one-year old. I had no idea he could reach the lock until he opened the door and ran out. In my haste to catch him, I not only peed all over my pants that were still around my ankles, I faceplanted on the nasty, moist bathroom floor. FML

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Today, I found out that my boyfriend of over a year has been cheating on me the whole time, but that "it's just physical". However, he doesn't want to do anything "physical" with me, except cuddle when we're together. FML

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Today, I bought a lanyard for my new car keys. "Epic Fail" was printed on it. Not two hours after getting it and putting my keys on it, I locked them in my car. I don't have a spare. FML

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Today, I sliced my arm open on the weekend, patched it with a fabric bandaid. Had an allergic reaction to the bandaid, arm now swollen, blistering and keeping-me-awake itchy. Pharmacist's advice? "Oooh, that looks bad. Better put a bandaid on that." FML

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Today, a guy asked for my number. He used the rather annoying "You know, this iPhone has everything... but you know the only thing that's missing is your number." I might have given it to him, if he did have the iPhone, not the makeshift box of Mini Wheat Thins he had in his hand. FML

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