Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Inspection time

Inspection time

Anonymous - - United States - Monterey

Today, my grandmother made a rule that every time we take a crap, she has to examine the turds to make sure they aren't big enough to clog up the pipes. I don't know what's worse: that she looks at my turds, or the fact that she actively comments on them. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

painful - 24/07/2011 08:55 - Norway

Today, I was stuck in the car with my grandma for an hour as she described to me how she had looked through my great grandma's poop to make sure her calcium pills were being digested. FML

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Terms of service

Anonymous - - United States - Las Vegas

Today, my grandma called me spoiled, materialistic, and Americanized for reminding her that she can flush the toilet after she uses it. The family now has a "three pee, one poo" minimum before we're allowed to flush. FML

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As a treat

Username - 28/06/2011 20:40 - United States

Today, I stepped in a turd. Not a dog turd, my grandmother's turd. FML

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tracy4191 - 13/06/2016 15:27 - United States - Ponchatoula

Today, I found out my grandma has been slipping laxatives into my food. Apparently, I was constipated once as a child and "once constipated, always constipated." FML

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Keep your secrets, do your own laundry

Anonymous - 25/09/2019 22:00 - United Kingdom - Chester

Today, I found out that before my grandma washes my clothes, she smells my underwear to "make sure they're dirty." FML

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Anaconda

lizbeth - 23/05/2021 04:01

Today, I took a massive shit and flushed the toilet, but it apparently didn’t flush properly. My mom then entered the bathroom, took a picture of my shit, and showed it to everyone she knows. She doesn’t understand why I’m embarrassed, and thinks that I should instead "take pride" in my giant poop. FML

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Anonymous - 15/09/2013 21:16 - United States - Dover

Today, my grandmother opened the bathroom door to find me eating a spoonful of Nutella while on the toilet. She is convinced that I was eating my own shit and will not stop telling everybody. They believe her. FML

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Helping hand

Anonymous - 29/07/2020 05:01

Today, my granny has been constipated for the past two days. She is too weak to get out of bed, so I ended up trying to dig the poop out of her butthole with a spoon. Yay me. FML

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Not again!

green and not with envy - 13/06/2014 20:17 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my dad called me into the bathroom, saying, "Get a load of this shit, son" and forcing me to look at the biggest, foulest-smelling turd I have ever seen in my life in the toilet. It's been three hours and I still feel physically ill. FML

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MsConfusedd - 09/08/2012 14:51 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I discovered that the only thing more disgusting than watching a little kid shove their finger up their nose and eat their fresh green mucus is watching your grandmother do the same. FML

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svalaedgren 18

Saturday 22 June 2013 11:25

Perhaps you should talk to her about how absolute gross that is. Toilet time is private time

darwinism 30

Saturday 22 June 2013 11:27

Your grandma thinks you are so full of shit you would clog her pipes?

LyraAlluse 25

Saturday 22 June 2013 13:58

Everyone's a critic. Even when it comes to.poo!

imtooshy 18

Saturday 22 June 2013 14:12

Call a Plumber once to fix the problem that clearly she knows exists or live in that gross atmosphere? I'd pick option number 1!

perdix 29

Saturday 22 June 2013 16:04

#31, but Grandma insists on Number Two.

Jjimen1654 9

Saturday 22 June 2013 15:00

Cant you just lock the door and flush without her knowing? Or she like the poo police now, watching the bathroom nonstop.

DobbyGotPwnd 10

Saturday 22 June 2013 15:12

*every time I take a crap

perdix 29

Saturday 22 June 2013 15:18

I'm wondering what happens when she finds a "clogger." Does she fish it out and bury it in the backyard? I'm envisioning a little old lady suiting up like Captain Ahab and returning armed with a harpoon. "Whale, ho!!"