Work, Customers Relatable I hate my job - FML

I hate my job

Moo - 25/05/2022 14:00

Today, awaiting the end of my shift at a call centre, I received my last call. The caller had a riddle: “What’s a cow’s favorite place to go? The moooo-vies!” He then laughed like a hyena and hung up. I wish I could pay my rent with riddles. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Gotcha!

Anonymous - 08/05/2014 03:57 - United States - State College

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

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Call center hell

AndrewC - 14/02/2024 03:00 - United States

Today, while I was working at a call center, a customer was pranking me using an obviously fake Asian accent. He kept saying his name was “Phuck Mi”, his phone number was 666-3629 (as in "Sex sex sex free sex tonight") and making moaning noises and sexual phrases. I don’t get paid enough for this. FML

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Dothy - 17/11/2008 09:54 - France

Today, I had an important appointment for a job. During the interview, my cellphone rang. My ringtone is "Denver, the last Dinosaur". FML

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Bored

anonymous - 25/10/2011 01:33 - United States

Today, I was so bored at my job as a receptionist that I actually got excited when the phone rang. FML

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thankyouforcalling - 01/06/2015 22:46 - United States - Bremerton

Today, the phone lines at work have been cutting out in the middle of calls. I'm a receptionist at an animal hospital. I now have less than two minutes to figure out what's wrong with a client's pet and how best to schedule them before I become "That rude bitch who hung up on me." FML

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onlyme123 - 27/06/2018 15:00

Today, I got a phone call. I thought it was just one of these toll free numbers that were always calling so when I answered the phone, I said, “City morgue: you stab 'em, we slab 'em! How may I help you?” It was my college calling to discuss my grades. FML

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Moo

Moo - 27/08/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I had to sleep in a room with my son, since we are visiting relatives at a farm. Every time a cow moos, he says "Cow". I can't sleep. FML

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Boo! Get better jokes!

Bad open mic night - 25/09/2025 00:00

Today, I thought I was alone in the breakroom, so as I reheated my lunch, I started practicing my stand-up comedy routine out loud. I was halfway through a joke about constipation when the vending machine guy poked his head out from behind the vending machine he was restocking and said, “Don’t quit your day job.” FML

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Drunken antics

Stilljobless - 19/01/2010 11:51 - United Kingdom

Today, I got a missed call from a job that I really really want. I completely forgot that my answer machine message was a ridiculous and rude poem that I recorded previously when I was drunk. Somehow I don't think I'll be getting a call back. FML

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Mr IT - 24/11/2009 01:47 - Sweden

Today, the company offering the job position that I've been applying for called me up. I wasn't there to answer so they got redirected to my voice mail in which I'm acting like a drunk David Hasselhoff chewing on a cheeseburger. They called me 5 times. FML

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RichardPencil 30

Wednesday 25 May 2022 16:53

You can, become a writer for Jeopardy. By the way, the joke is dumb because cows really don't like movies.

Marcella1016 31

Thursday 26 May 2022 19:26

How would you know? Have a degree in cowmunications from UC Bovine?

RichardPencil 30

Wednesday 25 May 2022 16:53

You can, become a writer for Jeopardy. By the way, the joke is dumb because cows really don't like movies.

Marcella1016 31

Thursday 26 May 2022 19:26

How would you know? Have a degree in cowmunications from UC Bovine?

protoskore 27

Friday 27 May 2022 22:15

at least it's better than the old "what's brown and sounds like a bell?"

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, while cooking with my girlfriend, I thought it would be funny to slap her with a raw porkchop. She thought it would be funny to throw the hot cooking grease on me. FML

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Today, I got a knock on my door at 3 a.m. Turns out, if I ignore my mother long enough, she will assume I have died and will call the cops. FML

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Today, I ruined a 4-year long friendship over something stupid, and I'm now being ghosted. I tried to fix it several times, but she doesn't care anymore I don't think. Imagine being the antagonist in your own story. FML

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Today, I got woken up and kicked out of bed. Apparently if I cheat in her dreams it still counts. FML

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Today, I have an ear infection, and everything I hear echoes inside my head. I'm an orchestra teacher, and we have our first concert next week. FML

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Today, my sister told me about a website that explained why our stressed cat has been obsessively pulling out the fur on her legs. Interested, I asked for a link. Not just out of deep concern for the cat, but because I have the same problem. FML

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