Health, Painful Love Hammer-headed

Hammer-headed

Anonymous - 11/08/2014 16:27 - Canada - Saint John

Today, after ignoring my concerns and declaring that "safety equipment is for pussies", my husband went rock climbing for the first time. He only sprained his ankle, but is acting like it's broken. He's now playing video games in bed and pissing in a bucket, because walking is "too painful." FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

owie - 29/08/2019 12:00 - Canada

Today, after breaking my leg, I'm unable to put any weight on it whatsoever. Our bedroom? Upstairs. Our only bathroom? Basement. My husband thought it would be a great idea to leave me alone and unable to walk to go babysit his nieces. I had to piss in a bucket. FML

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Slipping up

Anonymous - 18/10/2010 23:28 - United States

Today, I slipped and sprained my ankle while shopping for a present for my husband, who later came home and tripped over my elevated leg, hurting my ankle again. Now I have an excruciating sprain, and a spouse who's furious at me because, I "shouldn't have tried to surprise him." FML

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Remember planking?

say dump him and i'll kill you - 29/12/2012 00:50 - United Kingdom - Soham

Today, proving that there's no limit to the stupid shit people will do, my husband called me from hospital, needing a lift home. He tried planking on top of his car while his buddies sped it down a hill, and I now have to take care of him while his broken leg heals. FML

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Legend

Anonymous - 23/03/2021 05:59 - United States

Today, I tripped really hard and twisted my ankle on a toy that was on the floor, dropping a bag of trash filled with coffee and energy drinks my husband has piled around his desk. Instead of helping me up or helping me clean, he berated me about it. Told me that it's not my problem and went to his LoL game. FML

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I would do anything for my kids

Claus - 07/10/2023 22:00

Today, I took my kids to an indoor playground. My two year-old wanted me to climb the rock wall and ring the bell. I slipped right when I was about to touch it. I landed wrong and felt a 'POP' and agony. Hello, broken ankle. FML

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Rellies - 02/05/2019 02:00

Today, my husband is finally fully recovered from getting decompression sickness during our scuba diving vacation. Today is also the day I snapped my femur in half while skiing. FML

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Flying high

jkim - 08/09/2014 17:56 - United States - San Diego

Today, my husband injured his back badly. He's taken three Percocets, because according to him, he knows the dosage better than his doctor, and is demanding that I let him drive himself to work, with no pants on. FML

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Anonymous - 15/05/2016 14:03 - United States - Salem

Today, I had my first real break from work in ages, so I decided to go hiking. Less than 20 minutes in, I tumbled a couple hundred feet down a steep hill, broke my leg and several toes, and lay there in agony for an eternity before I was finally rescued. FML

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Slapstick

Anonymous - 05/10/2023 04:00

Today, as I was on the floor playing with the dog, my husband walked past, tripped over something, and fell on me, smashing his bony elbow right into my crotch. FML

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Shelved plans

twobyfour -

Today, after spending two hard months losing 20 pounds of my 80 pound goal, I was actually excited to exercise. After I was done exercising, I fell down the stairs and broke my ankle. FML

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Nymeria_fml 25

Monday 11 August 2014 22:03

It seems like "walking's for *******" now.

gunda95 11

Monday 11 August 2014 22:04

His logic is sound. Video games cure everything.

ThatOneGuy678945 1

Wednesday 13 August 2014 21:49

You're dad is awesome.

tinklovr_23 8

Friday 15 August 2014 8:17

Sprains hurt worse than breaks!

LigerFan 1

Saturday 16 August 2014 3:20

The peeing in a bucket IS a bit much.

CandyApple88 13

Saturday 16 August 2014 8:23

if it didn't destroy the bed, i'd have emptied the piss bucket into his face and told him to stop being such a pansy arsed little bitch.

XPENGUINWAFFLEX 3

Saturday 16 August 2014 23:20

Sounds like an awesome dude. I'd like to shake his hand.

allplayedout 20

Sunday 17 August 2014 19:29

Don't empty the bucket. Don't do it.

cassandra__ann 2

Friday 22 August 2014 2:14

Sprains are actually worse than breaks, ligaments and tendons take longer to heal than a bone because they don't get enough blood supply especially in the ankles. Educate yourself.