Love Good boy

Good boy

TrainedBF - 12/09/2009 12:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend, who is a dog trainer, was telling me all about the techniques she uses at work. I commented on how the dogs must be stupid to fall for such simple tricks, to which she replied, "They worked on you." FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Sociopathic method

Anonymous - 27/08/2021 18:01

Today, it seemed like my new boyfriend worked wonders training my puppy. Now she listens, doesn’t bark and doesn’t chew everything to bits anymore. I was very impressed, until my boyfriend told me beating a dog until it behaves works every time. My dog isn’t trained; she’s too terrified to move. FML

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Afroman720 - 27/07/2015 18:55 - United States

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because her dog "told her to". FML

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misTreated - 30/05/2010 04:01 - United States

Today, I was spelling T-R-E-A-T to my fiancé so that the dog wouldn't understand what I was talking about. Turns out, neither could my fiancé. FML

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mykhael - 21/08/2013 18:58 - United States - Opelousas

Today, my girlfriend and I started fighting. Instead of arguing for herself, she decided to set her puppy on me. Only "Puppy" is the name of her fully-grown police-trained German Shepherd. FML

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Fetch!

Anonymous - 07/04/2020 17:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were throwing a toy for his dog. He threw it, and I turned my head in that direction, looking for almost a minute before realizing he didn't actually throw it. He's still amused because, "even the dog was smart enough not to fall for that." FML

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You had to ask

Bryan - 30/09/2020 17:01 - United States

Today, I was working out with my trainer. A question popped up in my mind, so I asked if she had to deal with fat people a lot. She then responded, "I'm working with you, aren't I?" FML

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Argument ender

Anonymous - 14/10/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I was arguing with my girlfriend when my dog brought me a squeaky toy and tried shoving it into my hand so I could throw it for him. Out of habit, I grabbed it, but then it squeaked every time I tried to make a serious point. FML

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I'm fine, this is fine

btg - - United States

Today, I found out that my girlfriend feeds her boogers to our dog. Sometimes she even makes her do tricks for them. FML

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Alexa, play "Meat Is Murder" by The Smiths

meat is meat - 07/10/2019 02:07

Today, my girlfriend went on yet another long-winded rant about how dogs are family and should be treated as such, whilst stuffing her face with ribs. I asked her what the difference was between a dog and the pile of pig parts on her plate. Her only response was to call me a monster and dump me. FML

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Great friends

Need new friends - 18/07/2023 03:00 - United States

Today, my "friends" showed me a video of them pranking my arachnophobic coworker with a fake toy spider. She cried. I told them very bluntly that they're horrible people and owe her an apology. They responded by getting their mean ass dog to antagonize me. I'm afraid of dogs. FML

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mathsponge 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 16:31

GahhahahhHhHa I luv ur gf... Ydi for calling a dog stupid

F___M__L 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 16:17

lmfao nice

jmcr 27

Friday 9 November 2012 5:10

You set yourself up for that one

LUFT 12

Friday 29 March 2013 9:06

Hahaha! Want some ice for that burn?? ;P

xerbrus 14

Sunday 16 February 2014 21:48

It's easy to train someone i did an experiment in college that when the subject spoke they were slapped after a couple days they had stopped speaking

kunjac0945 21

Sunday 12 April 2015 5:41

Someone who tries to "train" and manipulate other people? That almost sounds like abuse, certainly not love at the least.

Matt Paugh 3

Friday 23 April 2021 18:17

Gives a whole new meaning to doggy style

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I was lying in bed minding my own business when my mom entered the room. I was proposed to a few weeks ago by my boyfriend, and my mom came in to tell me that my boyfriend's mom was on the phone. Turns out, he stole the engagement ring from her drawer. FML

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Today, I found out my 8th period science teacher got fired. Our final is tomorrow. FML

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Today, my mother yelled at me for not doing all of my homework. She got so mad, she tore up a drawing I'd spent over a week working on. That was my art homework. FML

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Today, I got stuck in a group project with three other people who spent the whole period trying to figure out how old the teacher was. Good news: They came to the conclusion that he must be around 35-40 years old. Bad news: we are gonna have a hard time finishing this project if they don't pull their weight. FML

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Today, my son is an idiot, but I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt by giving him a job as a cashier in one of my stores. Within half an hour, I was sent security footage from that store's manager showing my son on his phone, ignoring customers, picking his nose, and stealing money from the till. FML

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Today, my landlord sold the apartment I’ve been renting for 10 years without telling me. I found this out when the new owners showed up at the door with boxes. FML

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