Sex, Awkward, Painting Love Dry

Dry

moresexperience - 11/09/2009 12:26 - United States

Today, I had dinner with my girlfriend of five months along with my mom and dad. It all was going fine until my mom asked aloud, "Everything going smooth for you in the bedroom?" to which my girlfriend replied, "No." I'd actually been painting the master bedroom at my parent's house for some extra cash. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Caught in 4K

Anonymous - 22/03/2009 13:04 - Malta

Today, my parents were out so I invited my girlfriend over. It was the afternoon, and things started to heat up. We were having sex, and I was about to finish. Then I looked through the window, to see a construction worker (who was fixing the house next to mine) giving me a thumbs up. He's her dad. FML

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Tense dinner

bittenbyadonkey - 28/01/2011 17:23 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my family. Everything went well until my mum started hitting the brandy. While kicked back in her chair, she asked my boyfriend how satisfactory I was in bed, and if he enjoyed going down on me. FML

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Hiya!

mal - 08/05/2012 20:46 - United Kingdom - Chelmsford

Today, I brought my girlfriend home while my parents were at work, and things got a little heated. We lost track of time, because the next thing we knew, my dad burst into the living room. He doubled over laughing and asked how much I paid her. FML

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sometingwong - 01/12/2011 20:32 - United States

Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML

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fmjob - 21/07/2009 04:39 - Canada

Today, I finally told my parents I would be changing bedrooms because I could no longer stand hearing them having sex, which is awkward and disturbing. Later, my dad came and asked me quietly if I thought my mom sounded "satisfied." FML

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Handy

Anonymous - 06/03/2011 18:15 - Sweden

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a handjob in the shower. As I was reaching climax, my mom walked by the bathroom door and started talking to me. My girlfriend didn't stop, and in order to distract from the situation at hand, I had to carry on the conversation with my mom. FML

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Anonymous - 13/06/2014 09:27 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I had dinner for the first time with my boyfriend's parents. It was awkward enough without his mom asking, "So, what do you do for fun, besides my son?" FML

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Not now, guys

Sonofa - 17/05/2013 15:52 - Canada - Cold Lake

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus." FML

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Scolded

oopsies - 08/01/2010 01:07 - United States

Today, after having sexual intercourse with my boyfriend, we went downstairs to find his parents had come home early and had heard everything. I then received a long scolding from his mother of how I'd disrespected her house. My boyfriend received a high-five and a thumbs-up from his dad. FML

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What's this?

sorrydad - 13/12/2009 18:55 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I had our parents over to our new apartment for the first time. We spent hours cleaning, cooking, and making sure everything was "parent-appropriate." Apparently we didn't notice the BDSM catalog in the pile on our coffee table... but his mom sure did. FML

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boone_fml 0

Friday 11 September 2009 19:54

Try communicating with your girlfriend about how you can take her to the bone zone. It doesn't matter what your mom was talking about. If she's not happy she's not happy.

llllllllllllllll_fml 0

Friday 11 September 2009 20:31

she is dumb. who would answer that question?

plexico 3

Friday 11 September 2009 22:12

She should have said, "Hell, no! It's going rough, real rough, just the way I like it. Thanks for raising a wild beast, lady."

Casualt1234 0

Friday 11 September 2009 22:48

a globetrotter always save the good sex til the final two minutes

DeathShad0 1

Friday 11 September 2009 22:42

Solution: Fix it.

A2G_fml 0

Friday 11 September 2009 22:57

YDI for not being good and having a girl that would talk to your parents about that

baritone1whs07 1

Friday 11 September 2009 23:26

maybe she should pay more attention to the convo. or if it sounds like a weird question to ask dont answer or ask what do you mean

lolololcheese 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 0:11

******* IDIOTS who didn't understand...............

longboat 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 0:39

I would hate to9 have parents like that who don't know what the **** they're talking about.

shudder_glasses 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 2:01

this is where the pronoun y'all comes in handy

GriefBacon 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 7:53

Sorry....what is the significance here? A play on words? A har har de har har that I am supposed to give you? No. No... I don't get it.

MarcFirewing 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 10:47

... *facepalm* that's all I have to say.

friscobuff 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 12:19

YDI FOR STILL LIVING WITH YOUR PARENTS!

ashj 0

Saturday 12 September 2009 15:41

Except... it doesn't sound like he is? "I was painting the master bedroom at my PARENT'S house for some extra cash." Even if he was living with them, how does that mean he deserved it? He may be too young to have his own place, and even if he's not - it's still not relevant.