Transportation, Cars, Accident Religion Can't let the big man upstairs wait

Can't let the big man upstairs wait

Sirsriracha - 21/10/2021 14:01

Today, I posted bail for my mom from jail. She did a hit and run, and then resisted arrest. When I asked why she didn’t stay at the scene, she unapologetically said, “I was gonna be late to church.” FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

What?!

needmorelocks - 03/07/2012 05:36 - United States - Santa Paula

Today, my mom called to chew me out for having my sister arrested. My sister broke into my apartment, rearranged my living room, and claimed she now lived with me. She then threatened me with a butcher's knife for not appreciating what she had done. My mom wants me to pay the bail. FML

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Anonymous - 07/10/2018 12:00

Today, I hit someone’s car and got arrested for a DUI. I had to tell my parents so they could remove me from the insurance. My mom's response in the background after I told my dad was "I knew it." FML

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mymomsstupid - 29/06/2011 14:51 - United States

Today, I woke up to the news that my mom's in jail. FML

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Main character syndrome

daddysjudy92 - 28/09/2018 14:00

Today, after being hospitalized last week due to a severe mental breakdown, my mom is still mad at me for missing her big solo at church. She had even tried to demand I be released from the hospital for it. She's still going on about how she thinks I missed it on purpose. FML

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Get a move on!

Anonymous - 09/06/2011 02:00 - United States

Today, my mother set off the alarms at Walmart by shoplifting. She shouted at me to run, which I didn't. I had to get a ride home from the security guard, since my mother left without me because I didn't get to her car fast enough. FML

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Taylor Easley - 17/03/2012 04:53 - United States

Today, my mom was put in jail for beating the shit out of my dad. FML

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the only sober one - 15/05/2013 06:21 - United States - San Diego

Today, as usual, my mom got shitfaced and started berating me for something. This time, it was for missing a therapy appointment. Not only am I unable to drive, it was her appointment. For her alcoholism. FML

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Anonymous - 03/06/2011 01:07 - United States

Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you cops! I can drive under the influence if I want to!" It took me a second to realize it was my mother. FML

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Anonymous - 22/12/2010 22:23 - United States

Today, my mother took a bunch of sleeping pills, then went driving. I followed her and dialed 911. Now she thinks that I was "trying to get her arrested," and she refuses to talk to me ever again. FML

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Anonymous - 31/10/2011 04:12 - United States

Today, while in the car with my mom, she gave me a lecture about how bad of a driver I am. During that process she ran a red light and hit a car. FML

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RichardPencil 30

Thursday 21 October 2021 14:23

It'd be funny if they talked about the parable of the Good Samaritan at church. Maybe your mom would get her head out of her ass and think, "Hey, maybe I should have helped the person I hit."

slkeithh 14

Thursday 21 October 2021 18:08

There's a special place in hell for people like your mother.

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 21 October 2021 14:23

It'd be funny if they talked about the parable of the Good Samaritan at church. Maybe your mom would get her head out of her ass and think, "Hey, maybe I should have helped the person I hit."