Welcome to the neighborhood

Username - - United States

Today, the couple with three noisy toddlers in the apartment above mine finally moved out. A couple with a non-stop crying newborn moved in. FML

29 570

3 241

  

Which side are you on?

thefuckman - - United States

Today, I woke up to a glorious sunrise, fresh coffee, and a bleached lawn. My neighbors on both sides have constantly fought with each other since before I even moved in, which I guess explains the note taped to my window saying, "Pick a side." FML

23 977

1 723

  

I'm not paid enough for this

Doublescrewed -

Today, I showed up for my first shift in my new night job; I now work at an apartment complex during the day and at a gas station at night. It turns out that our biggest problem tenant in the former happens to be my boss in the latter. FML

24 638

1 634

  

"ztodaro" - 30/06/2017 20:00

Today, while I was inside a store, I heard a crash. Of course I ignored it because my car was parked. I paid for my items and walked out to see this. Nobody else was around. FML

3 890

291

  

WHO ARE YOU?

Targeted - - United States - Kirkland

Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML

34 214

2 903

  

Paranoid

MaddyN - - United States - Forest Grove

Today, I almost got fired from work because a customer complained that I "threw up gang signs" at him. I was blocking the sun from my eyes. FML

47 060

3 538

  

Guilty

jamienicole1993 - - United States - Savannah

Today, I woke up to a broken car window and a text from my ex that read, "Before you ask me, the answer is yes." FML

34 945

3 342

  

Creeped out

emoney - - United States

Today, I was walking out of my front door in the town where I intern. I live alone and know no one. As I'm locking the door, I see a golf ball wedged between my mat and step. I notice that there's writing on it so I pick it up to read, "You look hot when you sleep." FML

78 656

3 778

  

Night time entertainment

Anonymous -

Today, I woke up next to my roommate staring in horror. She said I was singing and farting in my sleep. Loudly. FML

3 308

438

  

There's no justice

Anonymous - - United States

Today, my car got keyed because I was parked in a handicapped parking spot. I'm handicapped. FML

35 897

2 634