Booze is bad

Eight months on the lease left - 24/11/2025 12:00

Today, I caught my boyfriend drunkenly pissing out the window. Apparently, I should be happy he pissed out the window instead of just wetting the bed. When I suggested he drink less, he got furious and yelled that I might be a lesbian, since I apparently want him to be a "pansy girly bitch boy." FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

The Phone Call

turnmyphoneoff - 24/09/2019 00:01

Today, I got a drunken call from my boyfriend, which consisted of him telling me that he, "does man things like fuck bitches and roll with hoes," and that I've been, "trying to turn him into a half-ass girly man," but, "that shit ain't right." Then he threw up. FML

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gp28 - 18/02/2010 20:08 - United States

Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML

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lillymean - 03/02/2012 01:02 - United Kingdom

Today, I reached a new low in my relationship: my boyfriend got so drunk I had to help him take a piss. FML

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Miramichi - 30/05/2011 12:18 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he pees on the toilet seat just to piss me off. FML

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vetapplez - 04/04/2009 08:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend turned 21 and got drunk at a bar. Being sober, I went through the whole ordeal: calling a cab, carrying him up three flights of stairs, helping him by the toilet, and taking him to bed. Just when I'm about to sleep, he gets up, pushes his shorts down, and pees on me. Twice. FML

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TooShortToCleanThat - 20/03/2015 03:22 - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided to show off one of his favorite skills: Peeing on my ceiling. FML

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21! - 03/07/2012 01:53 - United States - Schenectady

Today, while walking around my college campus, I passed by a dorm where a drunk guy was peeing out one of the top floor windows while his drunk friends cheered him on. That guy is my boyfriend. Lucky me. FML

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Oh Romeo…

Anonymous - - United States

Today, my drunk boyfriend decided to try to serenade me by throwing rocks at my window and singing a song about how much he loves me. This would have been extremely sweet if he would have gotten my window instead of my dad's. FML

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Anonymous - 10/05/2014 13:00 - United States

Today, a guy drunkenly professed his love for me. He did this after walking in on me peeing, which he decided was the time to tell me such a thing. FML

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Pissy - 23/05/2019 06:05

Today, I thought my boyfriend wanted to be romantic by pouring a bath, getting in then calling me in. As I get comfortable, he stands up and gets out. At the same time, I notice yellow water. He'd pissed in the tub for a joke. FML

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Charlie Given 26

Monday 24 November 2025 14:52

Sounds like it's time for you to leave and if you're worried about getting out of the lease, in most states you can break a lease if there is irreconcilable differences between you and your partner.

Wanderlei Santos 11

Tuesday 25 November 2025 8:19

you have a typo. should be ex-boyfriend.

Charlie Given 26

Monday 24 November 2025 14:52

Sounds like it's time for you to leave and if you're worried about getting out of the lease, in most states you can break a lease if there is irreconcilable differences between you and your partner.

DLBL 20

Monday 24 November 2025 16:14

Usually it requires domestic violence, not just a drunk pisser talking shit.

Wanderlei Santos 11

Tuesday 25 November 2025 8:19

you have a typo. should be ex-boyfriend.

FluffythePink 23

Tuesday 25 November 2025 17:10

Why are you with this abusive alcoholic who's still living like a frat boy? You need to sit down and seriously contemplate this question. 8 months is more than enough time to get your exit plan sorted properly...