Health Sports Black Swan

Black Swan

Anonymous - 08/08/2009 22:17 - Australia

Today, I competed in a ballet competition and made the finals, while I was on stage awaiting the results, I sneezed really loudly and snot went flying all over the stage. When I went to accept my award the woman presenting it refused to shake my hand. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Act three, scene one

anon - 12/08/2024 14:00 - New Zealand

Today, I was performing in a community theater production. Right before my big scene, I felt a sneeze coming on. I tried to hold it in, but it came out with such force that I lost my balance, fell off the stage, and landed in the lap of the mayor, who was in the front row. My character’s dramatic entrance was unforgettable for all the wrong reasons. FML

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Anonymous - 01/02/2010 19:29 - United Kingdom

Today, I was giving a class presentation, when I suddenly sneezed so hard I wet myself. FML

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Say it, don't spray it

Anonymous - 05/05/2024 00:00 - Australia

Today, I was giving a presentation in front of my class. Mid-speech, I felt a sudden urge to sneeze and tried to hold it in. Instead, I let out the most obnoxious, window-rattling sneeze imaginable, complete with a spray of snot, which landed on my notes. I think I traumatized my classmates for life. FML

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Memorable presentation

paul - - France

Today, I had a big meeting. Halfway through my presentation, I sneezed, and continued talking. I get some weird looks from my co-workers, but I didn't understand what they meant. When I finished, I passed by my boss walking to my chair, and he gave me a handkerchief. Why? Snot was all over my tie. FML

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Butterfingers

Anonymous - 22/11/2025 12:00

Today, I sneezed so bad in public that I dropped my coffee, kicked it while trying to catch it, and watched it slide dramatically across the floor into someone’s shoe. They gasped like I'd committed a crime. I just whispered, “Sorry” and fled. FML

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My fault, somewhat

Craig - 05/02/2009 20:13 - United States

Today, I was awarding medals to finalists in a school club. While putting one around someone's neck, I ended up poking a girl in the eye. She tried to be a trooper by continuing to walk across stage, but I guess her eyes got really watery because she missed the step and fell, breaking her ankle. FML

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sickly - 20/01/2011 05:47 - United States

Today, I came to school really sick because I had to take an important exam. After I finally finished, I accidentally sneezed on my answer sheet right before turning it in. The teacher refused to take it. FML

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gassy - 29/12/2012 09:32 - United States - Kirkland

Today, I auditioned for a role in ballet. My stomach was in pain and as I ran to be lifted into the air by my partner, I let out a huge fart. The auditorium was dead silent. FML

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HWS - 15/04/2011 05:47 - Canada

Today, I sneezed so hard I fell down the stairs. FML

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Flirtatious bubble

BoogieCandy. - 23/10/2009 08:56 - Canada

Today, at work, I was standing at the till helping an attractive man. I have a cold and could feel the snot bubbling up. He orders and we flirt for a bit. Just as I'm about to hand him his product, I sneeze quite loudly and forcefully all over his face. Guess I won't be getting that number. FML

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Lokizzle 0

Sunday 9 August 2009 2:11

Quite and achoovement. SEE WHAT I DID THERE?

DameGreyWulf 0

Sunday 9 August 2009 2:11

Aw, yuck. You sneezed EVERYWHERE... but not your hand (I guess?), so that was mean of her. Shoulda held your nose, maybe?

R3nesmee 0

Sunday 9 August 2009 2:36

YOU JUST LOST THE GAME

corbygray528 0

Sunday 9 August 2009 3:01

I hate you. So much right now.

R3nesmee 0

Sunday 9 August 2009 3:19

I'm sorry, I've just always wanted to do that on here... :D

thtnerdykid 0

Sunday 9 August 2009 4:11

what game?

thtnerdykid 0

Sunday 9 August 2009 6:24

(now i know, and lost)

Paige_Nicole10 0

Sunday 9 August 2009 3:16

i don't blame her. common hygine rules.

jane99 0

Sunday 9 August 2009 3:47

TIP: If you push your finger on your upper lip it numbs the nerve endings and you own't sneeze.

epicwinmaster 0

Sunday 9 August 2009 4:10

do you not blow your nose? how could you let that much snot build up that it flies all over the stage?

BLNovelist 0

Sunday 9 August 2009 4:30

That has to seriously be an exaggeration..you'd of have snot dripping out of your nose if there was enough to fly all over the stage. Not to mention, I think that sneeze would have made your nose explode if it had that much power behind it...really. Anyway, that was rude of her. You do have two hands - I imagine at least one didn't have snot and germs all over it.