Health Baked - FML

Baked

Monty - 01/03/2009 08:45 - United States

Today, I was baking cookies. When I took the tray out of the oven, I closed the door, but it bounced back open and hit me in the back of the knees. That caused me to sit down on the hot oven door. I was only wearing my short bathrobe and no underwear. I really burned my ass and, um… stuff. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Kitchen nightmare

cookiemonster - 13/08/2013 16:10 - South Africa - Johannesburg

Today, after placing it on top of the stove, my hot tray of freshly-baked cookies slipped. I caught it, though. With my bare hand. FML

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Anonymous - 03/04/2011 15:14 - United States

Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML

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anonymous - 12/03/2012 08:03 - United States

Today, I burned my butt on the heater when I tried to warm up after my shower. FML

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My home hates me

Anonymous - 24/07/2015 02:13 - United States - San Francisco

Today, over the course of three hours, I was burned by our toaster oven, hit in the head by a fridge door, hit my toes on a chair, clipped my hip on a table edge, and had both the washer and dryer lids slam on the same hand. I'm not sure what hurts more, my body or the shame. FML

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Slippery when wet

anonymous - 03/01/2017 01:03 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I managed to spill piping hot oil all over my kitchen floor, thinking it was too hot to clean right then and there I left it for a few hours to cool. I forgot about it, and slipped over in it bashing my head into my cupboard handle. FML

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Sam_Licker81 - 19/11/2009 16:41 - United States

Today, I was baking cookies and opened the oven door to check on them. Apparently, wearing a gold necklace means the wave of heat will burn your very fair skin. I now have a bright red ring of stars around my neck. FML

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Anonymous - 29/01/2012 05:50 - United States

Today, I was cleaning my room and set my burnt out light bulb on my computer chair without any second thought. Later, I sat on the chair, the light bulb shattered and I got a huge gash on my butt. FML

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..… - 13/09/2011 14:48 - United States

Today, I was in a hurry to get something out of the oven, so I quickly grabbed my roommate's only oven mitt and grabbed the pan in the oven. It didn't take long to figure out there was a hole in it when my thumb hit the hot pan. FML

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Hazardous

Anonymous - 28/09/2016 13:08 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my kitchen is trying to kill me. So far, I've hit my head three times on cupboards that opened themselves, cut open my hand on the microwave door when it slammed shut, and burned my cheek with the "heat-proof" oven mitt when I pushed the hair off my face. FML

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cantcloselegs - 20/10/2013 12:39 - United States

Today, I was using my new curling iron to curl my hair. I was sitting down. Suddenly I dropped the iron and, as a reflex, I caught it between my bare thighs. FML

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areyoukiddingme7 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 17:47

that really suckss. but did you drop the cookies? lol

DDDDana 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 18:44

Daaaang. Cookies shouldn't ever be the cause of pain.

caitlin_marie 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 16:08

awh :( im sorry. rough day eh?

smoothcriminal12_fml 0

Friday 9 July 2010 18:01

YDI for baking naked and for not being careful

itsnikki 0

Wednesday 11 August 2010 9:01

At least he has cookies now

Sae_Ghelk 6

Monday 20 June 2011 10:54

^ Great way of looking at it. Hehe.

XXizzlerXX 0

Tuesday 21 June 2011 11:57

your on fire !

abbyelizabeth 9

Sunday 25 September 2011 6:33

I want to know why you were baking cookies naked? Or is that just how you oregon people do.

BirdieCurls 25

Sunday 4 January 2015 3:36

maybe they just got out of the shower and didn't have time to put on real clothes?

thebaroness1984 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 16:32

Oh my GOD, that is awful. I'm so sorry. Get better! :-/

That_Guy 4

Sunday 1 March 2009 17:16

thats sucks man! ouch!

that_one_guy 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 17:34

I'd definitely go see a specialist or atleast a doctor about that, might have some serious issues later on

areyoukiddingme7 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 17:47

that really suckss. but did you drop the cookies? lol

dammn 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 17:49

ouch !

I_Suck_At_Life 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 18:43

That's terrible. Hope u feel better. =) *Mwa* #6 How should he know it would come back out? Its defenitely not your fault.

DDDDana 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 18:44

Daaaang. Cookies shouldn't ever be the cause of pain.

kagome_eb 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 18:44

oh my god! ouch ouch ouch

csigabajnok 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 19:02

Yeah, I also learned it the hard was that you should always dress up properly before even thinking about going close to the oven/cooker... :

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, I was violently throwing up due to severe morning sickness. My boyfriend looked at me, then turned and walked away. In the end, my daughter gave me some paper towel and her juice. My 18-month-old is more supportive of my pregnancy than her 30-year-old father. FML

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Today, I found out that the foundation I've been using for the past month isn't normal foundation, its skin darkening foundation. I look like an oompa loompa from the neck up. It won't go away for another month. FML

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