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Lifefail887

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Wednesday 29 November 1995

Lifefail887

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Lifefail887

lovers5201

Cali

xaatasi

Lifefail887

Lifefail887

Why not?

Anonymous - 02/01/2009 15:53 - France

Today, my girlfriend confessed to me that she wants to dress me up in her clothes, with a wig and makeup. FML

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No gods, no masters

anon - 31/07/2015 20:28 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML

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konacoffee17 - 14/12/2014 05:15 - United States - Portland

Today, I was having a nice conversation with my fiancé when he said out of nowhere, "I sold some of your panties". I thought he was joking so I said I hoped they weren't any of my favorites. He wasn't joking, though, and now some stranger from Craigslist owns my panties. FML

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Dude, seriously?

mellielynnemily - 26/10/2014 22:46 - United States

Today, at my apartment complex, I was carrying a bag of trash up to the dumpster. A guy stopped his car and helped me carry it the rest of the way. I thanked him and he asked me out. I explained that I was married. He grabbed the trash bag and carried it back to my apartment. FML

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Naughty boy

Anonomous - 29/12/2013 00:31 - United States - Plainfield

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML

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