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carbuncle776

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San Bernardino, USA
40
Sunday 05 January 1986

Carbuncle776

Carbuncle776 -

Carbuncle776 -

Carbuncle776

lovers5201

carbuncle7...

im_a_squid

demix_fml

mikotomisa...

fxreveryou...

Carbuncle776

Carbuncle776

The unexpected

RikkiTikkiTavi - 12/11/2019 05:00

Today, I was working at my desk and wearing my new noise cancelling headphones. I couldn’t hear anyone around me, so I let out a nice long fart. Every desk behind me was occupied and the fart was not silent. FML

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A beautiful truck decoration

Anonymous - 13/11/2019 05:00

Today, someone threw a sausage roll in my truck, but I ignored it because I was about to start a 2 day round trip. 6 hours later, I stopped for coffee. I have seen that it was a massive dildo, the ones with a suction cup on the base. The suction cup had stuck the massive dildo in the door for 6 hours and 200 miles. FML

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Sex ed 101

clapping_for_you - 14/12/2018 12:30

Today, during a private discussion, my teenage son confessed to me he finally lost his virginity several weeks ago. Why did he confess? He came to me to ask why it all of a sudden hurts when he pees, and asked if it could have anything to do with it. FML

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Ewwwwwwww

Warriorwizzle - 15/12/2018 04:00 - Vietnam - Hanoi

Today, I had to move down to the third floor because after complaining about rats on my rooftop the landlord put down traps. The rats died. Flies came. The flies laid eggs. The eggs birthed maggots. The maggots rained down from my broken ceiling into my bed and all over my floor. I'm not okay. FML

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Good enough reason

Anonymous - 17/05/2017 20:00

Today, I finally found out why my girlfriend doesn't want kids. She discovered Rugrats recently and, after binge watching the whole series, decided that our would-be children would be too adventurous for us to handle. FML

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