Miss Springdale- Arkansas, US 28 years-old In a relationship
Today, after being married for 20 years, I found out that my wife has accounts on multiple dating sites, "just in case." FML
Today, I was driving my 9 month pregnant sister around in our golf cart when it died. I had to push it the rest of the way home. She wouldn't stop faking going into labor. FML
Today, I brought my Japanese girlfriend home for dinner with my family for the first time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML
Today, my son shaved his eyebrows. Two days ago, I caught my 10-year-old daughter watching porn. I'm totally winning at parenting. FML
Today, the guy I hooked up with last summer who was "going through a divorce" welcomed his new baby with his loving wife. FML
Today, while getting my eyebrows waxed, the girl pulled off a strip and screamed, "Susan!" The owner came over and gave a look of pure disgust before saying, "Oh honey, you need to focus. Just give her 5% off." My whole eyebrow was gone. FML
Today, I got an almost $200 vet bill because my mom's cat tried to eat a cactus. This same cat chewed through a wall only a week prior. I have no idea what this crazy thing will do next. FML
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