kwill94

Today, my parents got rid of our detachable shower head. Looks like I'm single again. FML

Today, I told my boyfriend I was ovulating. He said he didn't want to have sex because he was afraid of getting eggs on his penis. He then compared it to having sex with a fish. FML

Today, my girlfriend hummed the Jeopardy theme while I was trying to undo her bra. FML

Today, I put my boyfriend's t-shirt on and took sexy pictures with nothing else but panties. I then sent him the pictures. His reply was, "Can you wash that when you're done?" FML