Today, I'm broke, unemployed, 29 weeks pregnant, and in a weirdly... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By Delsha - 02/02/2018 03:27

Today, I'm broke, unemployed, 29 weeks pregnant, and in a weirdly complicated relationship. My "partner" is also broke and unemployed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40

You deserved it 53

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, I realized that my boyfriend is so obsessed with tickling me that my body has developed a conditioned response. Now I flinch every time he touches me, no matter what we're doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 713

You deserved it 4 467

Today, my mother still hasn't figured out that my ex is a manipulative cow who has no interest in a relationship with her, apart from her usefulness as a babysitter, and sympathetic cash machine, but when I try to tell her that, she gets mad at me. The kid isn't even mine, it's from the guy she cheated with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 227

You deserved it 108

Today, a man having a breakdown was trashing the shop, and I was talking to him, calming him down, when an old guy popped up out of nowhere and hit him in the back of the head, out cold in seconds. He then looked at me and told me, "That’s how you deal with crazy people. You need to grow a pair, son." FML

I agree, your life sucks 424

You deserved it 238

Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a TV show about wildlife. The moment the narrator said the word "peacock", my boyfriend broke down into hysterical laughter. He laughed to the point of tears, and had to excuse himself. I'm dating a man-child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 999

You deserved it 8 410

Today, my boyfriend got mad at me when his so-called "ways to turn me on" didn't work. What were these ways? Flicking my nips and inserting his finger in my belly button. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 269

You deserved it 551

Today, trying to be a good co-parent, I asked my ex if he’d like to go to the circus with our kids and I. His new girlfriend of a whopping five days said it made her uncomfortable. He stood us up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 192

You deserved it 194