Your everyday life stories

pregnantdisaster - 29/05/2016 22:43 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, I finally got my cast off from my leg, and while walking up the stairs to my apartment, I fell and I broke that same leg again. FML

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notlongenough - 29/05/2016 22:43 - United States

Today, while at dinner for our three year anniversary I told my boyfriend that I believed there was no better feeling than loving someone with your whole heart. In all seriousness, he glanced up at me and said, "Oh yeah? What's that like?" FML.

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oh - 29/05/2016 21:41 - United States - Chanhassen

Today, I realized why everyone in my class was being so unusually nice to me. They had a meeting secret about how they all felt bad for me. FML

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jdoski11 - 29/05/2016 20:22 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my kindergarten teacher and her husband came over for drinks with my parents. My kindergarten teacher got really drunk and started flirting with me. I'm 14. FML

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SpikedGroundhog - 29/05/2016 20:01 - United States - Tuttle

Today, I got back from a 6month trip to England. I had left my dog with my mom while I was away. My mom decided that she didn't want to take care of them so she took them to the pound. When went to get them I was notified that if animals are not adopted in 3 months that they are put down. FML

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coolguy51 - 29/05/2016 02:58 - United States

Today, i was looking through my girlfriends Facebook account, only to see that the is not a single picture of me and her relationship status is still. single. We have been dating for almost a year. FML

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OMGMum - 29/05/2016 02:08 - Sint Maarten (Dutch part) - Cole Bay

Today, my mother surprised our family by playing a clip of my ex singing a song he wrote. She tells everyone that the song is clearly about me, and that he's so romantic and that I should take him back. She doesn't realize that the song is about anal sex. My father, siblings and uncles do. FML

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OGKatalyst - 28/05/2016 17:59 - Canada - Leamington

Today, I came home from a 3-week vacation. Upon arriving home, I heard voices inside my house. Considering I live alone, I called the cops. Turns out I had left my TV on for the entire 3 weeks. Can't wait to see the electricity bill. FML

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otaku nerd - 28/05/2016 16:38 - United Kingdom - Bradford

Today, bought a new game for the Xbox one, including waiting for the game to install and then download a necessary update will take about 5 weeks. Really wish I'd kept my 360 now. FML

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Pandasarekool - 28/05/2016 14:51

Today, I found out that there's a chance that me and my potential boyfriend might be related. FML

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Earths_Venus - 28/05/2016 14:33 - Australia

Today, I got into trouble from my mum for not apologising to my grandpa after he was rude to me. He was angry because I haven't had kids yet. I can't have kids. I don't understand my family's logic. FML

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Kotlopou - 28/05/2016 14:07 - Czech Republic - Ocmanice

Today, I realised just how many things I'm allergic to. In my school, you can choose from 3 meals for lunch. Twice in a row I couldn't eat anything. FML

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herewego - 28/05/2016 06:03 - United States - Foley

Today, the night before my anniversary, I had to call poison control. Not for my small child or animal. For my husband. 27 years old next week and can't tell the difference between teaspoon and tablespoon. Happy anniversary! FML

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gharkun - 28/05/2016 05:35 - Australia - Nunawading

Today, my housemate called a house meeting. She opened the meeting by asking me to find a new place because I left the toilet seat up too often. FML

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Anonymous - 28/05/2016 05:19 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I caught myself apologizing out loud to my girlfriend after accidentally tossing my dirty laundry onto her. And by girlfriend, I mean anime body pillow. FML

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jessaurelia - 28/05/2016 03:16 - United States - Temple

Today, I found out I have a cyst on my spine that has been the source of the mind numbing pain I have. It is very rare and only three specialists in the United States can surgically treat it.

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Sasquatch7788 - 28/05/2016 03:14 - United States - Florence

Today, I had to comfort my 3 month old daughter because my wife's tantrum over ruining our couch, due to her OCD with vacuuming causing a tear in the apholstery, scared the living hell out of our daughter. My wife is still pissed and my daughter screams every time my wife tries to pick her up.FML

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Undatable - 28/05/2016 02:48 - United States - Ossining

Today, I was telling a boy a joke that involved a "secret boyfriend". When I finished it, he asked if it was true. I laughed and said it wasn't, to which he responded, "Yeah I sort of knew when you said you had a boyfriend". FML

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freddycrabs - 28/05/2016 02:43 - Australia - Canberra

Today, my girlfriend said only reason she dated me in the first place was because I was the only guy that didn't send her a dic pic. FML

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Manhattanz - 28/05/2016 02:39 - United States - Staten Island

Today, my brother tried to convince me the Earth is flat and that stars are people that died. FML.

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i8achicken - 28/05/2016 02:20 - United States - Irmo

Today, I tore a ligament (or several) playing ultimate frisbee. My foot swelled up so much that I can't even walk. I have to walk at graduation in a week. FML

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Not High - 28/05/2016 02:06 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my eyes were bright red due to my severe allergies, as I'd run out of allergy medication. People won't stop asking me if I'm high. FML.

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anonymous - 28/05/2016 01:57 - United States - Hollywood

Today, I found out I had a final for AP bio 15 minutes before the test. FML

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Catastrophy42 - 28/05/2016 01:55 - United States - Hurricane

Today my co-worker insinuated I was pregnant because I had to rush to the bathroom. An unfortunate side effect of the fertility drugs I've taken for the last two months. Yesterday my doctor told me I will likely never carry another child.FML

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CRricker - 28/05/2016 01:51 - United States - Spring

Today, I let my dog out so she could do her business. As some joggers were walking by, my dog became curious and pulled a string from my shorts, therefore making my pants fall down in front of the joggers. I could've worn a belt, but I thought "I'm at home, why should I?" They recorded a video. FML

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heather216 - 28/05/2016 01:40 - United States - Borger

Today, I sent a scathing e-mail to my daughter's teacher and principal because she told me the teacher publicly embarrassed her by announcing to the class she had summer school. Turns out she lied for no reason at all, she doesn't even have summer school.

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Newlywed - 28/05/2016 01:31 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, I took off my engagement ring to shower (or so I think) because it's too big, considering we haven't had the time to get it resized yet. We've been searching for over 4 hours and we haven't been able to find it since. It'll take us 3 weeks to get the same one since it was custom made. FML

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bellikovruz - 28/05/2016 01:07 - United States - Cincinnati

Today,I found out why my boyfriend has not talked to me in two weeks. He was texting his ex and forgot to text me FML

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MedoA - 28/05/2016 00:59 - United States - Rockville

Today,me and my little brother were walking back from school. He tripped and started crying. As I tried to help him people looked at me and thought I was trying to kidnap him. To men ran straight towards me and tackled me, I ended up with 4 bruises on my back and arms. Fml

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bellikovruz - 28/05/2016 00:50 - United States - Cincinnati

Today, I found out that the weird noise I thought was my cat ended up being my neighbor in my yard scratching at the window. For no reason. Just to be creepy. Fml.

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Problem Solving 101

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Today, I was hanging with friends up at my best friend's cabin. We were in his hot tub cracking jokes when he told one that sent me into a fit of hysterics. He tried to shut me up by splashing water on me. It worked, because when I jerked my head to the side, I dislocated a rib. FML

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Today, I fell going down the stairs and hit my head on the wall. My parents came frantically running to my side, but only to make sure I hadn't damaged the wall. FML

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Today, my four-year-old daughter called me by her mom's new boyfriend's name. Three different times. FML

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Today, I accidentally liked a coworker’s old social media photo while scrolling at 2 a.m. Panicking, I unliked it immediately, knowing full well notifications exist. The next morning, they casually asked if I was “up late.” I considered quitting my job. FML

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Today, I learned that my house's fly infestation is worse than I thought. I now have maggots crawling and dropping from my ceiling. I have to sleep under them. FML

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