By Anonymous - 13/04/2016 08:25
The Top
Tonight, on First Dates…
By John_Elvis - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Valparaiso
Just No
By KelseNM - 05/07/2020 14:02
By TipsyTj - 29/03/2016 13:05 - Canada - Kentville
Dope
By valarmorgoolies - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Binghamton
By Delicious - 21/03/2016 02:09 - Australia - Saint Kilda
By DmanTheMan - 18/03/2016 04:37 - United States - Charlottesville
DmanTheMan tells us more.
By CreeptacularBait - 16/03/2016 21:33 - United States - Reston
CreeptacularBait tells us more.
Hello there! OP Here! Sorry for the long post in advance! Thank you for all the comments! 1) I went for a walk outside while my boyfriend was off at a meeting at the main office (It's a HUGE Company). Since he was gone for hours I was trying to entertain myself. The man approached me outside the hotel as I was coming in. I only knew he worked for the same company because he had on a company shirt and was talking with a large group of other people wearing the same shirt. He stepped into my path inside to talk to me. 2) I didn't think anything was wrong at first but when I went to go inside I could see his reflection on the glass doors of the hotel and noticed he was watching me leave. I tried to shrug it off as me being paranoid. 3) The layout of the hotel is that there is a large open lobby plan. All of the rooms open up to the main lobby, so you could be on the first floor, or the ninth floor, and still see everything from standing in the main lobby. I was on the third floor almost already at my room when I glanced down and saw him in the main lobby STARING RIGHT AT ME. I immediately whipped my head forwards and watched from the corner of my eye and he refused to take his eyes off of me. I panicked and thought about hiding behind a pillar but realized that would alert him to the fact I knew he was there and might make him react in a bad way. I went towards my room, realized that that was also a bad idea because now he knew what room I was in, so I turned and went to try and head down to another room, but panicked again and hid behind a pillar when I saw he was counting the doors from the lobby and hadn't seen me come back out again. So I darted back in my room, locked the door, and stayed in the back room with a lamp at the ready. 4) I immediately tried to call my boyfriend but he didn't pick up. Not long after I heard someone at the door and had the lamp at the ready when my boyfriend walked in. He was completely bewildered, so I explained everything. He laughed and said if the guy did try to come to the room he would answer the door: Naked. 5) We ended up leaving a day earlier than expected and it turned out for the best because his friend apparently wasn't booked for the night when he needed to be so we gave him our room. We also warned him about the guy and he said if the guy did show up, he'd answer the door naked too! We did get some lovely sight-seeing in, instead. :)
Devil parents
By Pandaling - 26/01/2020 05:00 - United States - Minneapolis
By whitewater_al - 10/07/2009 21:22 - United States
whitewater_al tells us more.
well, I think I just realized why OP's don't respond to comments.
By Kayla - 06/10/2018 14:00
By Anonymous - 12/10/2018 14:00
Oh, hello there
By Jon - 18/01/2010 20:26 - United States
Brain worms
By smooth - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States
By SoSexy - 07/10/2012 10:25 - United States - Stockton
SoSexy_fml tells us more.
Hey guys! This is the OP. 1) I honestly don't know, my boyfriend suggested we try filling up a tire with them. 2) Albeit being a bit embarrassed, it was actually quite hilarious for both of us. We're both in our 20s, but we still laugh at bodily functions, immature as that is. That, and I can't exactly see what's happening behind there.
Where am I going wrong?
By Anonymous - 13/02/2016 09:25 - United Kingdom - Bournemouth
By Anon - 09/02/2016 12:39 - United States - Toledo
By Roll Tide of Tears - 17/01/2016 03:28 - United States
By notsofriendly - 06/11/2014 20:15 - United States - Austin
A+ for Effort
By Anonymous - 14/02/2017 22:40 - United States - Monroe
Captain Jack
By Anonymous - 11/08/2012 22:22 - Canada - Airdrie
By Anonymous - 10/12/2015 05:29 - Australia - Perth
By MileHighGirlGuy - 14/03/2017 14:00
Sneaky
By Username - 31/08/2011 07:36 - United States
By lisahb - 19/06/2012 22:16 - United States - Detroit
By spiderbaby - 06/10/2015 19:43 - United States - San Francisco
Can I make it any more obvious?
By itisobviouseinstein - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - New York
By Lucachoo - 22/09/2015 00:35 - United States - San Francisco
Lucachoo tells us more.
So yeah, storing money in the oven is a terrible idea. My bf (we'll call him Huck because he's a dumbass) is a bit paranoid and insisted on hiding the money somewhere where burglars couldn't find it. I told him it was fine since our nearest neighbors are a couple miles away but he insisted so I just gave up. Didn't realize that idiot would hide the cash in the oven then have a huge brain fart and use the oven to cook. We aren't complete idiots though, we do keep our life savings in the bank. The reason Huck put money in the oven was because we live on a farm that's a bit distant from the nearest major bank. We keep some money on hand in case something breaks and we have to fix it or make repairs and such. It's quicker when we have the money on hand. Otherwise we'd have to spend a couple hours driving to the bank, buying supplies, then coming back. Also while money does burn at 451 degrees, 451 degrees is the auto-ignition point of paper (the temperature that paper catches fire without being exposed to an external flame). So if the air temperature was 451 degrees the money would have burned but Huck put the money at the bottom of the oven, right on top of the hot metal burner thingy (I don't know what it's called) and that metal thing gets red hot. But yeah, Huck realized his stupidity after the oven finished preheating and managed to save some of the money though a third of it still burned to some degree. I'm still pretty pissed regardless and kinda feel like shoving Huck into the oven as well. The fact that he was trying to be nice by cooking dinner is the only thing preventing me from completely going apeshit on him. The first thing I'm making him do is go to the bank and try to replace the money. And he will never be in charge of safekeeping money ever again.
By Z - 06/11/2016 23:33 - United States - Cedar Rapids
Jailbird
By Donnie - 18/07/2019 06:00
Keywords
Haha no it's my third job. Funny thing is we also argue about where to store our files. I work in medical billing, and I am constantly working at one of our three offices, so I usually store my files in our Dropbox file but sometimes I save to desktop and can't access it from the other offices ? and she wants me to delete my files after I'm done with them