By anonymous - 23/04/2013 05:25 - United States
The Top
By stupidsantaclaus - 08/10/2009 05:14 - United States
By fmlxxxx - 23/09/2009 13:15 - New Zealand
By loki - 13/03/2010 09:17 - United States
By Rush Snake - 05/01/2009 03:57 - France
By burb - 25/09/2013 19:23 - Germany - Berlin
The joke's on you
By justjoking - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States
By Anonymous - 14/09/2011 15:47 - United States
By *sigh* - 08/12/2015 22:56 - United Kingdom
By Quendolin - 09/11/2015 14:07 - Germany
By motherlover - 05/08/2014 04:40 - United States - Hoffman Estates
Method acting
By irishbitch - 15/11/2009 07:51
By fishtities - 13/08/2015 02:01
fishtities tells us more.
What the puck?
By Anonymous - 04/04/2013 14:29 - United States - Portsmouth
By PaintedDoll - 20/06/2016 03:12 - United States
PaintedDoll tells us more.
Hey guys OP here. For a little back story the call was from my mother (I thought I put that in there). She has been married to her husband for about a year and they dated for about a year before that. I don't really see him except for holidays, because I've been living on my own since before they met. I didn't call him because he has his own children from a previous relationship, so I assumed he was spending time with them.
By Anonymous - 27/03/2015 08:17 - Canada - North Vancouver
By sadfantasy - 31/03/2016 06:00 - Canada - Toronto
I know that sound
By boredatwork - 29/01/2010 15:33 - Canada
MOOOOOM!!
By i_am_forever - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco
Let him cook
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Woburn
Spotted it
By dollabill009 - 06/06/2013 08:49 - United States
By badluck - 21/07/2014 19:31 - Canada - Medicine Hat
Traditional
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Ghana - Accra
By MrConcise - 01/05/2013 16:28 - United States
MrConcise tells us more.
Here's how it went down: The previous shop owner retired just before I started working at my job. I took over his office, but he left a lot of shit behind. Besides, when you find a pen that actually works, you don't look too far into it. I suppose the girl riding the moped should've tipped me off a little sooner, though.
By wellthen - 24/08/2015 21:56 - United States
By Tarlachia - 15/08/2015 17:42 - United States - Apopka
Tarlachia tells us more.
OP here. A little backstory... The vehicle I was driving is my work vehicle- a professional carpet cleaning van. I had driven the van to a job, realized there were no available parking spots to back it into and was thus forced to park it in the street and blocking two vehicles. I pulled the cleaning hoses and supplies to clean the apartment, finished the job, wrapped up and got back into the van. Only then when I shifted to 'drive' did the problem make itself known. Yes, it is an automatic. Not sure as to what was happening mechanically, I called our company's mechanic and it took him over an hour to get to me with the necessary part- a tiny little pin that pulls the shifter between gears and only takes a few minutes to replace without having to take it to a dealership or repair shop. So, in that hour long wait, an old lady came out to drive her vehicle to a store. As luck would have it, her vehicle was one of two that my van was blocking. She asked me to move the van, to which I replied that I couldn't as it was stuck in park. I explained I couldn't even shift it to neutral to push the vehicle out of the way. I explained I was waiting on someone to come help me. That made her day, and she started screaming at me for several minutes. Logic has failed to defuse the situation and since I am not a Vulcan and cannot sleep hold a bitch, I, treasuring the security of this job to provide for my family, chose to then get back into my van, roll up the window, and said "**** it. Time to FML." She left to go back inside after a few minutes. About 20 minutes later, the mechanic showed up, fixed my van, and I was back up and running to finish the day's work.
Second base?
By armtits and big pits - 05/04/2014 07:14 - United States - Cape Coral
By rusrs - 30/03/2012 02:16 - United Kingdom
By Ohshucks! - 20/07/2010 19:01 - United States
Technically Spanish
By LeChameauTrisomique - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - France - Saint-germain-de-la-grange
Keywords
OP here. We had been together for over a year now. Turns out she had been cheating on me for a month and decided to brake things off with me. The reason I didnt know she was the bartender there was because she was recently hired and since I dont usually go there nor did she tell me, I didnt know.