Health: Today, I woke up to find that my acne has lined itself beautifully...

There was a teen from the UK whose acne spelled out the word 'arse'. At least you didn't have something that bad:) Still sucks, hope it clears up for you.soon.

JKROB 16

Sunday 12 October 2014 8:35

sounds like a smash mouth song

PrettyBlackChick 16

Sunday 12 October 2014 11:30

LUIGI HAS SUMMONED YOU

Itsjustaphase 8

Sunday 12 October 2014 17:11

I'm disappointed there's no picture. :(

Caelophile 8

Sunday 12 October 2014 20:57

Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me...

FML on Facebook

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The Top

Today, while at the airport waiting for my flight, I sat down next to a mother and her son. As I pulled out a water bottle, she leaned over to her son and said, "Promise me you will never do what the man next to you just did." I have no idea what the hell I did wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 364

You deserved it 4 050

Today, I woke up next to a woman nearly twice my age. I don't know how to tell her it was drunken sex and not the beginning of a relationship. But I have to come up with something soon as I work with her Monday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 525

You deserved it 44 393

Today, my car horn got some sort of short and started beeping every 20 seconds or so. On the way to get it fixed, I got stuck in bumper to bumper traffic. Behind a cop car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 034

You deserved it 131

Today, I came home from work to see that my dog had shit all over himself and his kennel. He eaten an entire cake when I'd left him home for 10 minutes by himself yesterday. This not how I planned to start my weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 162

You deserved it 768

Today, my long-distance boyfriend came to see me and told me that he had a surprise for me. I was excited at the idea of a romantic gesture, but forgot about it until he arrived and things began heating up. As I was removing his pants, I said, "Ooh, you shaved!" to which he replied, "Surprise!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 744

You deserved it 4 597

Today, I was designing a newspaper page with a story about an aggressive female bird that was defending its nest and attacking students near some stairs. In the article were photos of victims who were attacked. We had a good laugh over it. Later, I was walking there and the bird attacked me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 438

You deserved it 61 690