FML's guide to a stress-free St Patrick's Day By Louis - 17/03/2017 18:15 - France - Paris Savour the flavor of the day, but be careful out there! I agree, your life sucks 725 You deserved it 196 Share Tweet Share
Today, I caught my boyfriend of 8 years cheating on me. I punched him in the face, he broke up with me. And I still had to cook him an entire turkey dinner. FML I agree, your life sucks 13 689 You deserved it 40 763
Today, it's been exactly one year since I’ve had sex, and even that was because my wife caught me masturbating and helped me out with a zero effort handjob that was over in 15 seconds, since I’d already done 90% of the work. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 002 You deserved it 294
Today, as a pizza delivery driver, I delivered to a customer with young kids. She gave the pizzas to one of her kids to take inside, where the kid dropped them and it went everywhere. She then rang the store and claimed that I'd dropped the pizzas, then told her to "suck it up." FML I agree, your life sucks 1 130 You deserved it 89
Today, after I returned from business dinner at a hibachi restaurant, my wife decided she wanted sex for the first time in years on a weekday. We did it and I pooped a little on “our” stupid white comforter. FML I agree, your life sucks 476 You deserved it 383
Today, I had a meeting with the CEO about a promising job with good pay and benefits. Upon meeting, we immediately recognized each other. He was someone I used to make fun of in school all the time. He responded by refusing to interview me and had security throw me out by force. Karma bites. FML I agree, your life sucks 10 524 You deserved it 118 289
Today, I tried to stand by my toaster and train myself to not jump when it popped up. Not only did I jump, I also knocked the toaster off the counter and onto my toes. FML I agree, your life sucks 14 886 You deserved it 22 572