By FML Approved - 13/07/2017 18:30 I agree, your life sucks 512 You deserved it 149 Share Tweet Share
Today, it’s my birthday. My boyfriend didn’t get me a present, or do anything special for me, because, “The rent’s paid, you have a fridge full of groceries… What more do you want?” Later on, he asked me why did I, “look so sad?” FML I agree, your life sucks 1 401 You deserved it 300
Today, after three unsuccessful months of trying to make me orgasm, my boyfriend finally succeeded. It came from his car bumping up and down while we drove down a pot-holed road. FML I agree, your life sucks 43 118 You deserved it 6 132
Today, I got dumped by my girlfriend. Why? She had been praying and came to the conclusion that God was telling her to leave so she could meet her soul mate. FML I agree, your life sucks 941 You deserved it 131
Today, I went to the eye doctor. For the past three days every time I wear my glasses I become nauseous, get migraines, and have that "fish-eye view" where everything is rounded. Turns out they placed my lenses on the wrong sides. FML I agree, your life sucks 30 836 You deserved it 3 060
Today, I took my 15 year old daughter driving. I yelled at her for not going safely around corners. On the way home, while demonstrating how to drive right, I went around a corner and hit a cement truck. FML I agree, your life sucks 8 371 You deserved it 58 004
Today, our new neighbour three doors up just moved in, he even came round to introduce himself to everyone to assure us he means to be a good neighbour, and won’t be too noisy. Six hours later we found out he’s Scottish and likes to practise his bagpipes in the back garden. FML I agree, your life sucks 629 You deserved it 132
Those aren’t the droids I’m looking for.