Intimacy: Today, while at a neighborhood party, my drunk mother told all... - FML

By annonymous - 07/09/2015 20:56 - United States

Spicy

Today, while at a neighborhood party, my drunk mother told all our neighbors, including a girl I like, about my struggles with a micropenis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 916

You deserved it 2 441

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Same thing different taste

Great chat!

By eric - 16/03/2011 07:31 - United States

Spicy

Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 243

You deserved it 96 494

By idontevencareanymore - 23/05/2014 21:25 - United States - Jarrell

Today, my mom came home drunk and crying, so I tried to comfort her and asked what was wrong. She wasted no time admitting that she'd hooked up with her ex-husband, AKA my dad, but that it'd sucked for her because he has a tiny penis. Thanks, I really needed to know that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 232

You deserved it 4 714

Small is beautiful

By dickless wonder - 21/10/2023 10:00

Spicy

Today, I met up with a girl I've been hanging out with a bunch recently. She said that we should be a couple, "unless you have a micropenis", then laughed. I actually do have a micropenis. I couldn't hold it together, and ran out of the bar, crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 872

You deserved it 197

By Sundendako - 27/01/2010 10:20 - Australia

Spicy

Today, my mum got drunk at a party and flashed me and my friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 457

You deserved it 3 558

By nick - 06/03/2011 01:42 - United States

Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 469

You deserved it 3 821

Bad game

By Dick the Greater - 25/10/2013 22:08

Spicy

Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents at a family dinner. There was plenty of alcohol on offer, as is normal at our get-togethers. She got blind drunk and ended up crying to my mum about how I can't please her because I have a small penis and my oral sucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 457

You deserved it 10 380

By goodgrief - 30/10/2013 18:28 - United States - San Francisco

Spicy

Today, my mom got drunk at our family reunion and told everyone how worried she is that my "excessive masturbation" would damage the nerves in both my dick and arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 951

You deserved it 8 798

By Anonymous - 09/01/2014 00:53 - United States - Piedmont

Today, I joined my friends out birthday clubbing. After I'd gotten a little drunk, a few guys asked for my number. I rattled off random numbers, until I accidentally said my mother's. Guess who woke up to a text at 2:17 in the morning, containing a picture of a penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 703

You deserved it 39 052

By Joe - 19/10/2009 04:32 - Cambodia

Spicy

Today, whilst celebrating my birthday with my friends and family, I met a girl at the bar who seemed interested. She became very disinterested and left after my mother whispered in her ear "If you go home with my son make sure he wears a condom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 137

You deserved it 2 970

Thanks mom

By Anonymous - 14/02/2021 14:01 - Colombia

Spicy

Today, my mom decided it was a good idea to remind me about my non-existent sex life while all the family was having dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 065

You deserved it 114

Next

Top comments

EvilTurtle 35

Tuesday 8 September 2015 7:12

It's not about the size of the boat, it's about the motion of the ocean.

rebeccacmlc 22

Tuesday 8 September 2015 7:17

That's an awful thing to say ... Privacy, intimacy should be respected by everyone, especially those closest to you, and most of all your mother !

Comments

scratchsticks 3

Tuesday 22 September 2015 21:18

all you need is a raincoat and booties

T1A2Z3 34

Friday 20 July 2018 4:44

Stop talking to your mother about your penis and maybe you'll get laid....

SaltyLurker 10

Tuesday 25 September 2018 22:31

Hey you know I've stumbled across plenty of online gay communities solely praising micropenises (and there are some hot guys there, too). Statistically speaking, I'd hazard a guess there are some ladies out there looking for someone EXACTLY your size =)

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Today, I found out that I've been taking the wrong math class all semester. We're only a few weeks from finals and I have no drops left. FML

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You deserved it 1 574

Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85 919

You deserved it 24 416

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You deserved it 582

Today, I brought my mom to my work’s annual party. She insisted on meeting my boss and introduced herself as my "very supportive, overly involved mother." To make it worse, she gave him a lecture about how I was “just too shy” to ask for a raise. My boss is now both confused and terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 392

You deserved it 239

Today, after spending years volunteering at community theatres and being accepted into a prestigious university for theatrical design, my public high school gave me a scholarship. All my mother could say was, "I'm sorry they wasted their money on you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 291

You deserved it 213

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno she once starred in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 055

You deserved it 9 503