Love: Today, as it's my birthday, I was hoping for a nice present from... - FML

By Alycat - 08/07/2017 14:29

Spicy

Today, as it's my birthday, I was hoping for a nice present from my boyfriend. What did he get me? A PornHub account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 965

You deserved it 867

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 30/04/2014 21:51 - United States

Spicy

Today, the only thing I got for my birthday was my boyfriend's offer to give me "the gift of anal". FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 670

You deserved it 5 535

Fashionista

By Anonymous - 14/05/2012 00:25 - United States - Newark

Spicy

Today, it's my birthday. All I wanted was birthday sex, but all my boyfriend could talk about was how great the new purse he got me was. I think he might like it more than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 622

You deserved it 5 731

That's hard

By Anonymous - 13/08/2021 04:01

Spicy

Today, for my birthday, my boyfriend presented me with his cock with a ribbon on it. Basically, HE wanted sex for MY birthday and had the nerve to accuse me of being ungrateful. For his birthday last month, I gave him multiple Xbox games. He couldn’t even be bothered to get me flowers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 911

You deserved it 271

By Anonymous - 29/01/2011 11:55 - Canada

Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend had been telling me for the past two weeks that he had something planned for the occasion. His plan? Me watching TV with his parents, who hate me, while he went to work. His gift? A brand new Xbox 360 for himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 996

You deserved it 4 153

By lowlife123 - 01/05/2012 03:01 - United States - Manawa

Spicy

Today, I found out my boyfriend gave me a surprise birthday present: herpes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 996

You deserved it 7 445

By same - 21/11/2015 06:39 - United States - Palo Alto

Today, my boyfriend decided to gift me soap, a razor, and deodorant for my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 818

You deserved it 6 893

By amber - 19/04/2012 18:00 - United States - Saint Paul

Today, my boyfriend gave me acne cream for my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 752

You deserved it 4 785

By Noname - 23/02/2009 01:32 - United States

Spicy

Today, for my birthday my boyfriend bought me a sexy outfit to wear for him. At the bottom of the bag was a razor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 195

You deserved it 18 680

Why not both?

By Alexandra - 20/09/2011 08:25 - Lebanon

Spicy

Today, I surprised my boyfriend by buying him an expensive watch for his birthday. He responded with "Aww, you could've just given me head, babe." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 658

You deserved it 8 998

Thanks, I guess…

By Anonymous - 21/09/2013 18:10 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. I don't mind crappy gifts, but I have to wonder why the hell my boyfriend bought me a home enema kit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 163

You deserved it 4 179

Next

Top comments

Jatok 17

Saturday 8 July 2017 14:41

Sounds like one of those tropes about getting someone a present that you want, hoping you can just borrow it all the time.

Dave_Davington 33

Saturday 8 July 2017 16:43

I'm sorry, could you repeat that?

Comments

ballerinaaub 17

Saturday 15 July 2017 6:48

At least he's there. Mine has missed all my birthdays for his family the past 6 years. This year I planned a get away and had to cancel because he's going to his brothers. Good ol lonely me.

Joshua Telker 2

Saturday 5 August 2017 6:48

I would be a okay with that

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Today, I ate dinner sitting on the floor. My petty roommate got pissed off during the weekend and decided the appropriate action would be to lock all the furniture in her room and refuse to give it back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 791

You deserved it 199

Today, my best friend can now say "I fucked your mom" to me and actually mean it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 147

You deserved it 3 681

Today, while walking to work with my best friend, he broke down in tears. I asked what was wrong, and he told me his mom passed away last night. All I could think to do was give him a hug and say I was sorry. Then some assclown walking past said "GAAAYYY!" and walked away laughing hysterically. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 525

You deserved it 1 710

Today, my friend gave me a fortune cookie that said, "Don't be saddened by an upcoming event". Three hours later my girlfriend broke up with me because she said I was too superstitious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 149

You deserved it 6 477

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend at a dinner with our two families. Not only did she flatly reject me, my dad said, "Good call. He's not ready." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 988

You deserved it 6 809

Today, I was flying back home from college with my Mom. At the airport, the ticket agent tells us she only has one ticket listed for Margaret. My mom and I have the same name. American Airlines thought a Margaret had bought two tickets by mistake, so they cancelled one of the transactions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 908

You deserved it 4 581