Miscellaneous: Today, I woke up at 4:40AM and went to the kitchen. My brother... - FML

By Anonymous - 01/05/2011 18:49 - New Zealand

Today, I woke up at 4:40AM and went to the kitchen. My brother and his steel-capped boots easily found me in the dark. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 034

You deserved it 3 849

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 11/01/2015 08:44

Today, my brother woke me up by trying to light my bed on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 968

You deserved it 2 844

Not a night owl

By Fail - 04/02/2023 15:00 - United States - Steele

Today, I woke up at the ungodly hour of 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom. It was of course quite dark, and unbeknownst to me, the door was closed. I walked into it. Then I tried to open it, missed the door knob, and walked into the door again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 594

You deserved it 294

By something - 16/02/2019 18:00

Today, I was walking home from school and my stupid brother who comes earlier then me locked the storm door. I ended up trying every other door for 3 hours in below freezing temperature. I was numb everywhere. I rang the bell and my brother opened it. He was home the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 374

You deserved it 2 569

By makeyourselfathome - 17/09/2014 12:18 - Australia - Richmond

Today, I got up at 4.30am, like I do every morning, and got ready for work. Just as I was about to walk out the door, my flatmate jumped me and beat the snot out of me thinking I was a burglar. Because apparently burglars shower, make toast and clean up before stealing all your shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 527

You deserved it 3 027

By vinniesuckmadack - 24/04/2009 17:53 - United States

Today, I woke up to go to school. I was unbelievably tired, but I gathered the courage to go take my shower. I then took a long shower, cleaned up my room, got dressed, and ate breakfast. Going back to my room, I looked at the clock, which read 3:22 AM. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 467

You deserved it 37 999

By rhplb - 17/05/2016 13:10 - Philippines - Quezon City

Today, I arrived to work at exactly 8 so I could leave at exactly 5, without overtime. I found out later that my brother took my keys with him somewhere and now I can't enter the house until he gets back at 11. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 132

You deserved it 906

By Anonymous - 23/07/2019 23:07 - Canada - Stoney Creek

Today, I was woken up and kicked out of my friend's party at 3:00 in the morning. This wouldn't have been so bad if someone hadn't stolen my shoes. I had to walk for an hour in the rain, in my socks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 643

You deserved it 409

Occam's razor

By anonymous - 12/02/2011 05:48 - Canada

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. Groggy and disoriented, I bumped into several pieces of furniture and made a lot of noise. My dad woke up, mistook me for a burglar, and knocked me out with his fist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 837

You deserved it 4 725

Classic

By blackvogue - 01/04/2009 10:42 - Canada

Today, I got up early to prank my family. I put a bucket of ice water on top of a door frame so whoever walked through would get an icy surprise. After I was done, I went back to bed. I woke up groggy and disoriented like always and walked right through the doorway I had rigged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 425

You deserved it 168 163

Sorry guys, please don't hurt me

By Anonymous - 11/12/2024 09:00 - United States - Eugene

Today, I tried to sneak a snack from the kitchen without waking anyone up. In my stealthy quest for a late night sandwich, I managed to knock over a stack of pots of pans and woke up the entire frat house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 156

You deserved it 451

Next

Top comments

ceinaworus 0

Monday 2 May 2011 3:31

so, I'm going for the most negative comment on FML. rate this as negative please : ) thanks everybody! but seriously, I don't want any positive rate shit going on.

j_cat187 19

Sunday 1 May 2011 23:40

with the steel toe, how you feel though, with my foot cramed up ur ass like a *****.

Comments

MythMaker 0

Monday 2 May 2011 6:50

I had the same situation ,, but with 25kg dumbells and right in my small toe. :(

EG14_fml 8

Monday 2 May 2011 7:12

I'm tryin to figure that out too!

xlil_miss_emo_x 6

Monday 2 May 2011 7:12

were his boots stylish atleast? 'cause if they were ugly... i'd be mad too. Lol jk but ouch. Been there done that...

atomicbaboon 0

Monday 2 May 2011 8:31

you should bust a cap in his ass to make even.

Boah78 0

Monday 2 May 2011 10:12

ydi for having a brother that wears steel tipped boots at 440 in the morning. you need say no more. trash.

robc32ca 4

Monday 2 May 2011 12:17

huh???

ydur 0

Monday 2 May 2011 14:00

I'm sorry I don't get it. how do you bump into each other without forewarning? at that time of night ALL noise is easier to desern. and then how is this an fml, did he pulverize u repeatedly without u screaming out "it's ME" quickly? doesn't make sense

fixitnow 0

Monday 2 May 2011 15:06

Learn to wash your own clothes

Based 0

Monday 2 May 2011 15:24

Don't you just hate when you get steel toe'd at 4:40 am.

XxbrokeNCYDExX 6

Tuesday 3 May 2011 0:59

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