Miscellaneous: Today, I walked into a liquor store and thought about inquiring... - FML

By Cup_of___ - 26/11/2009 16:23 - United States

Today, I walked into a liquor store and thought about inquiring for a job application. After seeing the cashier, I thought about inquiring if she was single. After accidentally breaking three bottles of liquor, I didn't do either. I left the store, still single and unemployed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 945

You deserved it 30 156

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Same thing different taste

Cash me?

By Anonymous - 02/09/2019 11:00 - Canada - Lakeville

Today, working in a liquor store, I had to tell a girl I couldn't sell her alcohol since she was severely intoxicated. She told me to "cash me ousside, how bow dat?" then smashed a bottle of wine and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 853

You deserved it 123

Double take

By Anonymous - 01/04/2022 02:00

Today, I walked into a job interview, then turned round and walked back out again. The interviewer was a one-night stand that ended very badly months ago, and she remembered me. I could see in her face the interview was pointless, so instead of grovelling I went to the pub to drown my sorrows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 203

You deserved it 553

Office embarrassment

By mog - 07/11/2019 08:00 - United States

Today, the girl who works at the liquor store came to where I work. She recognized me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 446

You deserved it 899

And I oop

By not drunk - 21/07/2020 08:01

Today, I was at a restaurant. I turned around looking for the restroom. I almost walked into the men’s room, then corrected myself and stumbled in the hallway looking for the ladies’. The employees thought I was drunk and kicked me out. I hadn’t had a single drink. I’m just clumsy as shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 512

You deserved it 268

Late night customers are the worst

By viviham - 04/05/2012 12:08 - United States - Spring Branch

Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 903

You deserved it 2 351

Smart move

By Triedtobecool - 06/04/2009 02:22 - Canada

Today, I went to buy beer underage for a party to impress a girl. I picked up the case of beer and went to the cashier, he ran it through without asking for ID. I left the store with a smirk on my face, I arrived at the party and showed the case to the girl. It was non-alcoholic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 977

You deserved it 99 976

By useless pos - 01/03/2013 00:48 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I went out to buy a bottle of wine and some condoms. As the cashier scanned the condoms, she snickered and muttered, "Yeah right." She was right; I really was just desperate to look like I have a sex life. I got so upset that I left my items and walked out with tears in my eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 321

You deserved it 12 404

Boozehound

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, I was refused employment at a liquor store. Their reason? I'm a regular customer and they're afraid I'll drink all their profits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 584

You deserved it 21 759

By bham boy - 20/04/2011 08:10

Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no idea why, but I replied "a bottle of milk please." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 379

You deserved it 33 767

By Marty - 10/10/2017 13:00 - United States - Irving

Today, I bought a small bottle of liquor to share with my husband to celebrate our move. It took three hours at the store as the cashier, manager, GM, and a police officer checked my ID believing it was fake. I'm 25. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 201

You deserved it 314

Next

Top comments

besad_fml 0

Thursday 26 November 2009 20:10

Wow. You are stupid. How did you break 3 bottles? YDI

xCrackerx 3

Thursday 26 November 2009 21:10

If you're this clumsy sober, I'd hate to see you when you're drunk.

Comments

Arancaytar 0

Monday 30 November 2009 20:59

Hm, maybe next time try this while sober? :P

lisha88 1

Sunday 19 June 2011 5:23

she made u that nervous? lol

DinoChick 0

Friday 1 July 2011 0:11

drunk by love

stevenmx86 7

Wednesday 7 December 2011 23:02

You're a worthless piece of shit OP..

atills 0

Wednesday 21 December 2011 23:31

You said inquiring twice, you were going to be single anyway..

indicashayde 8

Saturday 20 August 2016 5:09

Seems as though you've hit rock bottom. You can only go up from here.

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Today, my physician, a known drunk himself, told me I was drinking too much and I should quit before my kidneys decide to divorce me and take the house and car with them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 367

You deserved it 885

Today, my very sheltered girlfriend decided to surprise me by cleaning our apartment. Although she grew up with housekeepers and maids, I thought it was common knowledge that you don’t try cleaning the bathroom with both bleach and ammonia. We still can’t go back inside our place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 678

You deserved it 183

Today, my mom went to grab my sheets off my bed. I said that I would do it, to which she responded, "Calm down, it's not like I've never seen 'spludge' before." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 416

You deserved it 6 781

Today, I work at a debt collections center and I had to call my own father. Merry Christmas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 550

You deserved it 2 780

Today, I discovered that when you're the maid of honor giving a toast at your best friend's wedding, it's important to make sure the zipper on your dress is secured. Otherwise, your bare breasts and Hello Kitty panties could end up exposed to a wedding party of 600 people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 123

You deserved it 9 173

Today, I made fun of a girl singing passionately along to a song on her radio while in traffic next to me. She decided that her chocolate milkshake would make a good addition to my brand new seat covers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 102

You deserved it 81 625