Intimacy: Today, an hour after having been turned down for sex, I walked... - FML

By Anonymous - 25/11/2012 21:34 - Netherlands - Tilburg

Spicy

Today, an hour after having been turned down for sex, I walked in on my wife fingering herself to a copy of War and Peace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 504

You deserved it 4 676

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Same thing different taste

Rejection erection

By paidback - 25/12/2009 01:10 - United States

Spicy

Today, I rejected my wife for sex. She then started to masturbate next to me. I got an erection. She then rejected me for sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 685

You deserved it 83 502

By Korisite - 30/10/2011 05:31 - United States

Spicy

Today, my wife caught me masturbating to porn. She screamed at me and asked why I would be masturbating when I had her to have sex with. So I asked if she wanted to have sex, she said no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 432

You deserved it 25 060

Waste of time

By I'mmessedup - 29/09/2021 22:59

Spicy

Today, after weeks of every excuse not to, my wife wanted sex. It was amazing, and she had at least 3 orgasms. Instead of cuddling afterwards, she got up like someone kicked her and started bitching about all the things she could have been doing, as she got dressed and stormed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 227

You deserved it 555

Can't win

By Anonymous - 24/09/2019 22:00

Spicy

Today, I was in the mood for morning sex, but my wife told me to go wank it off in the bathroom. Three minutes later I was mid-wank when she started banging on the door because I was taking too long, and she needed to pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 202

You deserved it 385

Caught in 4K

By ScrewU - 17/08/2022 19:59 - United States

Spicy

Today, I got off early from work to catch my wife screwing her co-worker in our bed. I ask her what I did to deserve this. She told me she was “lonely” and that he “always makes her feel like a woman,” unlike me. She would come home from work and I would initiate intimacy, but she would decline every time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 016

You deserved it 182

Confuddled

By yosenfal - 28/04/2012 01:04 - United Kingdom - Plymouth

Spicy

Today, I came home earlier than usual, only to find my wife having sex with some guy on our bed. Her reaction to being confronted was to look me dead in the eyes and to scream and scream until I got so freaked out that I left. It's her house, and I'm sitting in a library with no idea what to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 095

You deserved it 4 100

Was it worth it?

By Anonymous - 20/05/2025 21:00 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, my wife has been super into sex lately, she even let me try some of the stuff she said no to before, and even surprised me with some of the kinky stuff she’s always wanted to try. Sounds great, right? Nope. Turns out she was overcompensating from the guilt of also fucking my coworker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 660

You deserved it 110

By Username - 18/03/2010 08:21 - France

Spicy

Today, my wife told me she was very horny as we have not had sex in about two weeks, so I told her to do something for me to get me in the mood. She sighed and then went upstairs to get ready for work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 621

You deserved it 49 959

Sorry

By Anonymous - 23/09/2013 18:06 - United States - Olympia

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend having sex with another man. Her main reaction was to get mad at me for not knocking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 932

You deserved it 5 082

That escalated badly

By Anonymous - 19/03/2020 09:03

Spicy

Today, a blowjob from my fiancée turned into exchanged oral, which turned into mutual masturbation while watching porn, which then turned into me being kicked out of the room because it was "weird" with me watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 389

You deserved it 413

Next

Top comments

iShanny 13

Monday 26 November 2012 2:55

Easy fix. Memorize it and recite it for her. Boom! Pregnant. Bonus points if you do it in another language!

JJJJJakkkkeee 6

Monday 26 November 2012 2:59

Are you sure it wasn't a copy of 50 Shades of Grey with the cover of War and Peace on it?

Comments

DarthVader77 9

Wednesday 29 May 2013 19:37

Get back at her by turning her down an jerking off to some **** at full sound. Make sure to mumble: Feels so much better than... Oh, I am sorry, Honey. Did not realize you were home. Memorize expression on her face at that moment.

Tressa1982 18

Wednesday 18 September 2013 6:39

Finally a guy gets a taste of their own medicine for once!

CoolCookie210 22

Monday 19 May 2014 12:40

Wow you must be really bad in bed if she'd rather **********

samfate 5

Monday 23 June 2014 16:47

at least it wasnt crime and punishment..... and at least its not to another guy and she isnt cheating. just taking a moment to herself. maybe just let her do her thing and talk to her about it later. best of luck.

worldclassrager 39

Wednesday 1 October 2014 12:03

Looks like she likes it long and hard...

mthurston 14

Friday 6 November 2015 23:51

Stand next to her, jerk off and cum on her face

sillishan 4

Monday 12 September 2016 5:13

i see all these post of married couples who have an unhealthy sex life. makes me never want to get married and glad that, at 37, i never have been married. i would retaliate by jerking off to **** very loudly on a regular basis until she knows what it feels like to be rejected and hurt.

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

The Top

Today, the slow, incompetent kitchen staff was keeping customers waiting for their food for 20 minutes. I got sick of a bunch of grown adults with kids my age ganging up on me, so I quit on the spot, and walked. Some guy grabbed me by the collar and dragged me back to the register. People cheered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 638

You deserved it 155

Today, my dad's last words before he fell into a coma, and later died, were about how he wanted to stick his face in the ass of his 20-something nurse and motorboat her cheeks. I had to lie to my mother and say that his last words were that he wanted to see her again before the end. Thanks dad, NOT. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 973

You deserved it 198

Today, I went into a restaurant with my family. I slipped off my chair, pulling the tablecloth with all the food and drinks on it with me onto the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 730

You deserved it 451

Today, I got screamed at by a woman at work for feeding her 3-week-old infant formula instead of the bottled Kool-Aid that she packed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 466

You deserved it 3 426

Today, it snowed. Rather than enjoy the view, my roommate had to complain every five minutes about the mentally challenged neighbor shovelling snow all day long. As long as he doesn't shovel it into my yard, I really don't care what he does to pass the time in lockdown. FML

I agree, your life sucks 853

You deserved it 104

Today, I'm extremely disabled and by all means terrible at drawing, but I tried anyway. Sure enough, my drawings looked like shit, but I still took pride in them. That is, until my brother looked at one of them and said, "Wow! That's awful!" Thanks for pointing that out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 678

You deserved it 137