Neighbours, Public freakouts, Conspiracy theorist and Miscellaneous: Freak out - FML

Freak out

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Eagle Point

Today, my weird neighbor is a conspiracy theorist and thinks the government is trying to kill him. Someone thought it would be funny to shine a red laser light through his window. I was on the stairs when he ran past, screaming bloody murder, sending me down a flight of steps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 458

You deserved it 3 621

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Same thing different taste

Just a prank, bro!

By Scared - 13/07/2019 02:30

Today, I played a harmless joke on my neighbors by pointing a laser pointer out of my window onto their wall. Apparently, my neighbors don't take jokes lightly as one of the sons pointed at my window while screaming and swearing, then took out a gang bandana and wrapped it around his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 721

You deserved it 3 056

By Anonymous - 13/02/2015 20:24

Today, my thundercunt of a neighbor, who's hated me since I moved in, called the cops on me. He told them he saw me shooting up on drugs. I'm diabetic and was injecting insulin, which he could only have seen by spying on me through my living room window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 023

You deserved it 2 231

Home sweet home

By readytomove - 18/09/2025 12:00

Today, my neighbor yelled “Fuck you!” at me through his window. My crime? Closing my front door “too loud.” This man lets his children beat on the walls and slam doors but apparently I’m the problem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 367

You deserved it 48

By Nell - 30/06/2011 21:10 - United States

Today, as I was going to bed, I spotted a man staring at my window from a neighbor's yard. Ten minutes later, he was still there. I freaked out, started crying, and contemplated calling the cops. My creeper turned out to be the neighbor's wooden lawn ornament. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 464

You deserved it 37 415

By inyobeddd - 02/05/2013 08:27 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my crazy neighbor came up to me in the street and slapped me across the face, accusing me of leering through her restroom window while she showered. I'm gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 943

You deserved it 6 725

By triple l - 15/10/2012 08:33 - United States

Today, the police searched my house because my neighbors thought we were aiming a gun with laser sight at them. We were only getting our daft dog to chase a laser light around; we don't even own any guns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 827

You deserved it 2 734

By Matti - 17/08/2018 22:00

Today, as I sat on the toilet, I heard a noise outside. I peered through the window and found myself staring directly at my neighbor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 213

You deserved it 245

By Ghettogirl4life - 12/07/2011 13:34 - United States

Today, I moved into my new apartment. My neighbor is apparently crazy and thinks I'm trying to 'steal' her husband. She watches me and is super paranoid. I have a two year lease. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 071

You deserved it 3 181

Leave me alone

By MIB - 13/07/2011 16:26 - United States

Today, I awoke to banging at my door. It was my neighbor, accusing me of stealing her mail to spy on her, because apparently she thinks I must be some sort of secret agent. The cops don't believe me when I call, and she won't go away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 755

You deserved it 2 829

By Anonymous - 16/08/2013 20:19 - Switzerland

Today, my elderly neighbour was having some kind of house party. It was incredibly loud, so I went and asked if he could tone it down a little. He responded by grabbing a deck chair, smacking me with it, then chasing me back to my house, all while his guests cheered him on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 826

You deserved it 7 601

Next

Top comments

amd1314a 8

Monday 14 October 2013 14:43

Unless there really was a sniper ... 0_o

DocBastard 38

Monday 14 October 2013 14:45

It's not paranoia if they really are after you. HEY, WHO THE **** IS AT MY WINDOW!?

Comments

HopeInBama 5

Thursday 17 October 2013 8:05

Lmao that was hilarious

derpshit_com 4

Sunday 20 October 2013 19:31

Lol. I cannot say more

TheJapaneseSushi 18

Friday 25 October 2013 6:23

Is your neighbor Dale Gribble?

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The Top

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Today, I awoke to my cat sitting on my chest. That wouldn't be so bad if I hadn't tried to get her off. She promptly went crazy and scratched me. My fiancée, who was sleeping next to me, hit me, called me cruel, and told me to apologize to the cat. I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 942

You deserved it 335

Today, I was trying out for a position as pitcher for my college baseball team. I threw the ball as hard as I could, and then collapsed to the ground in agony from a dislocated shoulder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 426

You deserved it 5 354

Today, the weather forecast said it would be nice all day, with only a tiny shower in the afternoon, so I went on a 50 km bike ride to enjoy the summer. In reality, it rained pretty much all day, with a little bit of sunshine occasionally in between. FML

I agree, your life sucks 773

You deserved it 199

Today, I realised that I wasted 10 years of my life studying for a godforsaken exam for my career. I took the dang exam 3 times, and failed it. This September will be my last and final attempt, and If I don't make it, I don't know what I will do with my life. Changing careers at 42 just seems too difficult. FML

I agree, your life sucks 755

You deserved it 203

Today, I got really excited at work over a deal I was about to close. I got up and started performing a rather obscene hip thrust only to notice a client sitting in the glass meeting room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 427

You deserved it 54 470

Today, I got surgery on one of my hands. I opted for a local anesthetic instead of being put all the way under. I soon discovered my hand hadn't gone completely numb when the doctor started slicing into the finger that needed operating on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 481

You deserved it 6 315