FML's Showdown #13 By Louis - 14/06/2017 21:30 Another selection of contenders for this week's crown, with this time bad dance moves coming under close scrutiny. I agree, your life sucks 621 You deserved it 187 Share Tweet Share
Today, I finally had sex with my new boyfriend, well… penetration anyway. Turns out, he has premature ejaculation, and no idea how bad at sex he is. He actually thought he did a good job by lasting 20 seconds. He was done after 4 thrusts and was somehow confused. I didn't orgasm either. FML I agree, your life sucks 3 777 You deserved it 418
Today, I had to go to the police station to pick up my 42 year-old dad. Why? He was caught stealing candy. FML I agree, your life sucks 69 993 You deserved it 4 702
Today, I held my cousin's new baby, whom I have nicknamed Canteloupe Head. He then reenacted the Exorcist by projectile vomiting all over my lap and shirt. His mom is a firm believer in karma. FML I agree, your life sucks 10 081 You deserved it 35 503
Today, I took my dog to the park, and he ran straight into a group of people having a picnic. Naturally, he grabbed the biggest piece of meat in sight and ran off with it. As I chased him, I tripped and fell in front of everyone. My dog then sat and chewed the meat in front of me. FML I agree, your life sucks 150 You deserved it 572
Today, six years after I gave up my newborn to my sister to raise, I finally told him I’m his real mom. In response, my sister took out a restraining order against me and blocked all forms of contact. The entire family has sided with her. FML I agree, your life sucks 183 You deserved it 1 850
Today, I caught my boyfriend making my cat dance to Cotton Eye Joe. FML I agree, your life sucks 112 You deserved it 356
Alyssa
Alyssa