Health: Emergency!

Emergency!

By Not dying. - 21/04/2015 07:55 - United Kingdom - Watford

Today, I started getting really bad chest pains at work. I googled it and the internet convinced me I was having a heart attack. Scared for my life, I started to dial for an ambulance when I let out the biggest fart you could ever imagine. Turns out it was trapped gas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 036

You deserved it 10 912

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Same thing different taste

Better safe than sorry

By Anonymous - 21/08/2025 23:00 - Australia

Today, I thought I was going to shit myself at work. I speed-walked all the way to the bathroom clenching for dear life. Barely got my pants down while simultaneously sitting and unleashing. After all that, it was just a gigantic fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 360

You deserved it 86

Inside out?

By Anonymous - 09/11/2023 21:00

Today, I’ve been having the worst gas, nausea, and stomach pain of my life and literally nothing I do works. While I was at work, I farted but it came from the inside out; it was so loud there’s no way everyone didn’t hear it. My stomach started bubbling so loud, the guy sitting behind me got up and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 449

You deserved it 154

By Tor - 21/04/2009 00:11 - United States

Today, I was in class and felt a sharp pain in my stomach. I began to scream and cry because the pain was horrible, so the teacher called 911. After being rushed to the hospital, I was told that "I had gas cramps and would be fine." My whole class was listening on speakerphone to make sure I was ok. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 823

You deserved it 12 977

By Anonymous - 17/07/2015 17:14 - United States - West Palm Beach

Today, I felt some serious gas building up while at the supermarket. I tried to quietly fart it out, only to end up sharting myself. I had to frantically waddle out of the store as discreetly as possible as several people in the vicinity freaked out and tried to locate the source of the smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 593

You deserved it 4 371

By Carla - 12/11/2017 01:30

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night choking and had to open my bedroom window. No, it wasn’t a gas leak. My husband had a curry last night and his constant farting was so bad I was struggling to breathe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 821

You deserved it 443

Hear this?

By soundslikeadumbcommentersituation - 11/07/2014 20:34 - Canada - Brampton

Today, while in my backyard, I had some insane gastric distress. I let out a fart so powerful that it made me yelp in pain, and left my asshole numb. A second later, I heard a cough come from over my neighbor's fence. I had to quietly limp back into my house in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 871

You deserved it 6 944

Better out than in

By Anonymous - 20/05/2020 02:00

Today, I had the most excruciating pain I've ever felt in my lower right abdomen. I was doubled over and vomiting it hurt so bad. After going to the E.R., thinking it was my appendix and getting checked in, I let out the biggest most rancid fart in my life and the pain immediately went away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 924

You deserved it 420

Trust issues

By Anonymous - 23/12/2023 14:00 - United States - Warren

Today, I ended up shitting myself when trying to pass what I thought was a small amount of gas, only for it to be diarrhea. I turned 37 last month. Never trust a fart, right? FML

I agree, your life sucks 484

You deserved it 221

By Anonymous - 24/07/2019 20:00

Today, I've had bad gas all day. In bed, almost asleep, I felt the urge to fart, and thinking nothing of it, I let it rip. It wasn't a fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 549

You deserved it 440

By Anonymous - 24/02/2012 08:40 - United States

Today, I gave myself a hernia while farting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 933

You deserved it 7 351

VonBlitzkrieg 27

Tuesday 21 April 2015 16:12

A "fart attack," if you will.

CODplayer4lyfe 24

Tuesday 21 April 2015 16:12

Never use the Internet to check your symptoms. Never.

Comments

Witchylady 17

Wednesday 22 April 2015 1:03

People should really stop self diagnosing their so called illnesses and leave it to the professionals. YDI as far as I am concerned

k8Pluss 8

Wednesday 22 April 2015 1:36

I work in the ER. Too many people come in because Google told them too. And then they're sitting there with a $6K bill and are pissed when it's just constipation or gas.

bbiscool2 12

Wednesday 22 April 2015 1:42

You got to be ******** me

anonymous100000 17

Wednesday 22 April 2015 1:47

just gonna say, you're an idiot. YDI

ConstantlyAnna 8

Wednesday 22 April 2015 1:54

I sure hope you weren't at your work desk when this happened...

Abianne 3

Wednesday 22 April 2015 2:54

Is it just me, or does anyone else see the phrase "started to dial for an ambulance"? As in, BEGAN to dial, but didn't actually call because OP farted before they finished dialling. I get the feeling everyone else is seeing "CALLED the ambulance" and that's where all the YDI comments are coming from. Still, chest pains wouldn't make me think "trapped gas" either. A stress attack? Yes. But gas? No.

TallMist 32

Wednesday 22 April 2015 2:54

"And if I did that, I think I'd have a fart attack." - Demi Lovato ...Wait, that's not right.

kirstymate 2

Wednesday 22 April 2015 4:20

Idiot. If it was a heart attack you wouldn't have time to look online

TheEpicKitten 20

Wednesday 22 April 2015 4:29

For a woman having a heart attack there is less of the massive chest pain (that tends to be a male thing) and more of fever like symptoms and aches all over the body