Love Are you OK?

Are you OK?

unicorn - 12/06/2009 16:49 - United States

Today, I went on a date with my boyfriend. Suddenly he starts speaking gibberish. I ask what's wrong? He says, "I was just talking to my unicorn. He says you're pretty," and winks at me. What have we learned today? The person I like is a freak, and apparently unicorns are real. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

kat - 21/02/2012 09:53 - Reserved

Today, a client stared at me in disbelief after I mentioned that I had a boyfriend. FML

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shastadoe - 06/08/2012 06:37 - United States - Los Banos

Today, my boyfriend told me he was a vampire. I burst out in laughter and said he was ridiculous. He looked at me in disgust and said he couldn't be with someone who didn't trust and believe in him. I'm now single. FML

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NocturnalFox - 25/08/2015 19:46 - Czech Republic - Plzen

Today, I went on a first date with my crush. Right before the date, I noticed a monstrous pimple in the middle of my forehead. I covered it with make-up, but it was still visible. The guy spent the whole evening laughing at me and telling me that I look like an unicorn. FML

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Never again

Catsfordays - 20/08/2015 06:02 - United States - Yucaipa

Today, I went on a date with someone I considered a real catch, my potential soulmate even. He ended up telling me about his fetish for "female smells", sang loudly in Italian in a crowded restaurant, and ate most of the food on my plate. Man, fuck dating. FML

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Anonymous - 24/08/2014 04:14 - United States

Today, a guy took me out on a date. His imaginary friends joined us. FML

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unicorn - 13/09/2011 21:21 - United States

Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML

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Tonight, on First Dates…

Anonymous - 19/03/2023 22:00 - Australia

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I really liked. He spent the whole time talking about his pet iguana and how it's the love of his life. FML

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Another one?

Anonymous - 27/04/2012 15:24 - United States

Today, I found out the guy I've been crushing on for many years thinks he's a werewolf. FML

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Sounds like a keeper

Rae - 30/03/2023 10:00

Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed really nice. However, halfway through the date, he started talking about how he was a flat-earther, and believed that the moon landing was faked. Oh, and that birds aren't real. I had to endure another hour of his conspiracy theories before I could finally escape. FML

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Red flag

Ugly - 06/03/2022 06:00

Today, I went to a wedding with my boyfriend. He became moonstruck with one my friends and said she looked sexy in her dress. The whole night, I was nonexistent to him. He’s now confused as to why I’m giving him the silent treatment. He literally has no clue. FML

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jorvid 0

Friday 12 June 2009 23:17

First of all unicorns is real, and you should be grateful that the unicorn even thought you were worthy of a compliment, you ****!

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Friday 12 June 2009 23:16

What's wrong with having imaginary friends that you talk to?

myotherlips 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 19:50

Unicorn = penis. The gibberish is just a little extra drama play to get your attention. lol. I'm not joking, some men have tried this.

rainbowsix_fml 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 20:18

This is one of the worst fmls I've ever heard

triper 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 20:38

... did he at least introduce you to his unicorn? If not, that would be very rude!

endercoaster 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 20:42

He was probably joking. Failing that, at least you know he's a virgin*. *Explanatory note: the lore behind unicorns is that only a virgin can see one.

ayebabyyyy 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 20:56

What is wrong with have a pet unicorn? Jesus, some people can be rasists! My unicorn Comquat, hates you all. He's very offended. UNICORNS UNITE ! HUZZAH !