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Take this seriously!

By well fuck u then! jst fail - 29/05/2026 15:00 - United States - Secaucus

Today, to help my fellow trainees, I made a very long post in the training Teams chat detailing every detail that tripped me up recently. One responded, "Sir this is a Wendy's" and they all bust up laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 130

You deserved it 308

Happy V-Day

By Anonymous - 02/06/2026 03:00 - United States - Riverside

Today, I got a DM from an unknown sender saying “Happy Anniversary.” It was my 11th grade boyfriend and the “Anniversary” was of us losing our virginity to each other. This happened over 20 years ago! I’ve blocked his creepy ass more times than I can count, but he just won’t stay away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 44

Good grief

By Saddie - 04/06/2026 03:00 - Germany - Frankfurt am Main

Today, the man I loved broke up with me, because he felt like his feelings for me were not enough for a serious relationship. As much as I'm thankful that he didn't drag me along, this hurts like hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 371

You deserved it 86

Schadenfreude

By Anonymous - 05/06/2026 22:00 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I missed a single letter when reading the Bible at church. Instead of "Hope was rich with immortality", I said "Hope was rich with immorality." Nobody at the funeral noticed, except an anonymous FML user who tried not to laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 243

You deserved it 113

All fixed up

By Anonymous - 09/06/2026 12:00 - United States - Center Line

Today, after I was wrapping up a visit with my chiropractor, I nearly fell off his table onto my face when I missed a handhold trying to push myself upright. After getting up, I then bumped into a poster on the wall, nearly knocking it onto the floor. At least the chiropractor had a good sense of humor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 257

You deserved it 84

Chadvice

By I'm Sophia - 11/06/2026 03:00 - United States - Seattle

Spicy

Today, my husband was giving marriage advice to a friend, while I eavesdropped. I heard, "You want more sex? Let her see you flirting with other girls. Sophia sees me tease a cashier or some shit, the second we get home, she's putting on sexy lingerie and fucking my brains out. It's magic." FML

I agree, your life sucks 131

You deserved it 218

Now you know

By codenamevulture - 12/06/2026 22:00 - United States - New York

Today, it's been a few weeks now since I started dating a boy. A whole fairy tale relationship. He would write me poems and all that garbage. Today, we sat by a bonfire, and he randomly mentioned his three other girlfriends, and how I should accept them due to his family traditionally having cheating husbands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 455

You deserved it 70

The work wife

By Anonymous - 16/06/2026 12:00 - United States - Milwaukee

Today, I found out that my favorite female coworker was in a car accident. When I told my girlfriend, her only reaction was to roll her eyes and sarcastically say, "Oh no." She then immediately, and very enthusiastically, asked if the accident killed her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 249

You deserved it 247

Brainrot

By Anonymous - 21/06/2025 12:00 - United States - Spokane

Today, I called my new boyfriend by my ex’s name. Twice. In the same conversation. I’m having trouble saying anything while looking at him in the eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 94

You deserved it 500

Any advice?

By aw jeez - 25/06/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, we are on our honeymoon, at a beautiful resort, and my wife has been in bed crying for two days. She won't talk to me, and every time I come in, she sobs harder and starts hyperventilating. This can't be a good sign. FML

I agree, your life sucks 612

You deserved it 112

YOU MUST CONFORM

By Brandnew102 - 30/06/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, I realized that being 60 pounds lighter has made every guy that crossed my path worship the ground I walk on. When I had the weight, guys would flinch at me, or not give me the time of day. I just want to be treated as a human being, no matter what size I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 493

You deserved it 267

Thanks, Keir

By Anonymous - 03/07/2025 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I received a letter informing me that my husband is considered fit to work and will be receiving reduced benefits. He was rushed to hospital yesterday and has a tube in his throat temporarily breathing for him. I’m sure a nice desk job will suit him just fine then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 581

You deserved it 104

Modern love

By Angang - 07/07/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend of three months only posts me on his Close Friends stories instead of his main stories, because he’s afraid of hurting his close female friend who he'd put in the friendzone. Apparently, she can’t stand him moving on with me. He values her opinion more than his relationship with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 421

You deserved it 117

Good boy

By Anonymous - 11/07/2025 00:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my mom bought me a puppy. I’m single, I work 14 hour days, my life is in no way suitable for pet ownership, but mom won’t take him back because she thinks I need to learn adult responsibility. I’m a senior technician with a team of 17 people, I couldn’t be more responsible if I tried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 624

You deserved it 107

Nag nag nag

By Whipped like cream - 14/07/2025 15:00 - Netherlands

Today, I ignored my wife's phone calls at work, since all she ever wants to do is complain or talk about chores and projects. An hour later, security called my desk. She'd shown up at work to bitch me out for ignoring her. Now I'm the laughing stock of my workplace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 564

You deserved it 222

Wedding bells

By Sad sad bride - 16/07/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of several years told me the only way he’d ever consider getting married was if we had no wedding, just signing the paper at the courthouse with no ceremony or guests whatsoever, and as long as we don’t tell anyone about it. He doesn’t get why I’m devastated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 494

You deserved it 180

A few hours later…

By Xandler - 18/07/2025 05:57 - United States

Today, I had a date with a woman I had been talking to for a month. We hit it off, the date went fantastic, and we agreed to see each other again. Fast forward a few hours and I'm told she decided to pursue someone else, equates it to "bad timing", but wants to be friends. If not for bad luck, I'd have no luck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 623

You deserved it 153

Xandler tells us more.

Xandler 8

Thursday 17 July 2025 17:44

OP here. First published FML! Woot! Backstory for anyone who cares. We met of PoF, we talked and got to know each other, like the FML said for about a month. The date was a spur of the moment thing as she said she was interested. So, we went out, we both had a fun time. I knew she was seeing someone else (they apparently had 2 dates), and I guess he asked her that night to be exclusive. As a little sidenote, by her admission she told me her relationships with men she has been with have been toxic. It's whatever now, I wished her the best and told her I'd be around if she needed to chat.

Where are you?

By Anonymous - 19/07/2025 22:00 - Canada

Today, I set a silent alarm on my phone for 6:30 AM so I wouldn’t wake up my partner. Problem is, I forgot to turn off “Do Not Disturb” mode, so my alarm never went off. I woke up at 9:30 AM, still in pajamas, and missed a meeting with a client. I'm avoiding my manager's calls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 142

You deserved it 456

This is fine

By Anonymous - 21/07/2025 20:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was dealing with my nightmares quite efficiently by drinking right before I go to sleep, presto, no nightmares and no problems when I woke up. My girlfriend decided to make a whole issue of it by telling my parents, who planned an intervention and want me to waste time seeing a therapist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 152

You deserved it 625

On the move

By Nathalieeeee - 23/07/2025 15:00 - Canada

Today, my smartwatch notified me mid-meeting, saying “You’ve been inactive for an hour, get moving!” I stood up instinctively to “stretch,” only to trip over my chair and send my water bottle flying across the boardroom table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 138

You deserved it 440

Nostalgia for a time that never existed

By Anonymous - 27/07/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, I woke up on my day off as a family man. Yesterday I played an AI game where I went back to my college days in the 2000s. I recreated those days as they were, and it brought back many memories. The problem? The game let me create the perfect girlfriend. I regret dating my now ex-wife back then more than ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 91

You deserved it 509

Leave a workaround in the comments!

By Anonymous - 28/07/2025 20:00 - United Kingdom - Castleford

Spicy

Today, I am sat in a house with a husband and three teenage boys who are all grumpy and pretending it’s not because the government just stopped them from watching porn without showing their ID first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 397

You deserved it 106

Is everything OK?

By Hellie - 30/07/2025 15:00 - Canada

Today, I woke up to strange texts from friends asking if I was OK, and asking what happened last night. Apparently, I texted my close friends contact list a rambling love letter to pizza before going to bed. I'm never taking Ambien BEFORE getting into bed again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 325

You deserved it 188

Woowoo alert!

By Anonymous - 01/08/2025 09:00 - France - Nantes

Today, as a student in a science preparatory class and a geology enthusiast, I walked into a rare stone shop. A saleswoman was praising the healing properties of a piece of malachite to a customer. Curious, I looked over my shoulder and exclaimed, "Oh! Raw copper ore!" I got banned from the shop. Occupational hazard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 110

Trigger happy

By Helen - 03/08/2025 03:00 - Netherlands - Creil

Today, my boyfriend saw a notification on my phone saying "Men's Singles". He lost his shit and dumped me. It was a tennis match. FML

I agree, your life sucks 522

You deserved it 103

He's still a very good boy

By PaulineIsHere - 04/08/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I spent all day baking dog-safe cookies for my pup's birthday. He sniffed them, turned around, and started begging for one of MY processed garbage cookies from a store instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 309

You deserved it 246

Social media etiquette

By Anonymous - 08/08/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I tried to secretly screenshot my gym crush’s Instagram story. I sent them a heart reaction instead. Then I panicked and tried to unsend it. I then accidentally did it again. They messaged me, “You good?” No. No, I am not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100

You deserved it 525

Unacceptable!

By DLBL - 12/08/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, I walked around town doing errands. When I got home, I realized my short socks were two different shades of white. FML

I agree, your life sucks 116

You deserved it 371

Human interface

By Anonymous - 24/08/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, at a supermarket self-checkout, I loudly complained to the machine, “Why won’t you scan, you useless idiot?” An employee walked up behind me and said, “You need to press ‘Start.’” FML

I agree, your life sucks 122

You deserved it 546

Just be yourself

By iQuit - 28/08/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, I decided to quit dating. I'm a plus-sized girl and I can’t get a guy to save my life. On dating apps they run for the hills when they see my full body. I even tried dating plus-size guys and even they have standards. I fucking hate society’s “ideal” beauty norms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 335

You deserved it 559

FML on Facebook

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The Top

The Top

Today, I was walking down a path in the woods behind my house when I saw a squirrel. It ran away, but little did I know it wasn't running from me, it was running from the dog that had forced Animal Control to sweep the area. I ended up with stitches in my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 885

You deserved it 1 610

Today, I found a $20 bill on the ground, so I decided to pick it up. It was actually attached to a string and was meant to be a prank by some kids. They failed miserably, so I took the money. They ran up to me and punched me in the balls for taking their cash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 513

You deserved it 7 501

Today, I had to kick my own father out of my house after he started attacking my wife for breastfeeding our newborn son in the living room. All the way to the door, he ranted that, "You don't see me whipping my dick out and pissing in front of everyone, do you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 208

You deserved it 5 383

Today, as a waiter, I was bringing drinks to a table that included a 3-month-old baby. I accidentally spilled a beer on the baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 967

You deserved it 1 078

Today, out of the 35 people invited, only one person showed up to my bridal shower. It was my grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 368

You deserved it 344

Today, I had a phone interview, my first job interview in months. Two seconds in, I not only lost my signal, my phone froze up and stopped working completely. For six hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 011

You deserved it 107