Wake Up Call By FML Approved - 07/10/2017 03:00 The most frustrating sound ever. I agree, your life sucks 466 You deserved it 91 Share Tweet Share
Today, a guy came into the small coffee shop I work at, and got angry because I wouldn't accept his Starbucks gift card as valid payment. When I told him we clearly aren't a Starbucks, he said "It's all the same shit" and ended up throwing a punch at me. FML I agree, your life sucks 47 257 You deserved it 3 161
Today, it's my 17th birthday, and the first birthday since my mother died, leaving me to live with my previously-absent father. He gave me pretzels and a laser pointer, and said, "Happy birthday, fuckstick." One more year… FML I agree, your life sucks 70 633 You deserved it 3 456
Today, I took a shower while my two-year-old slept. In the 30 minutes it took me to shower, get dressed, and go back to his room, he had woken up, taken his pants and diaper off, and smears crap all over himself and his bed. FML I agree, your life sucks 3 800 You deserved it 825
Today, after 3 months of quarantine being totally broke, I was finally glad to get back to work. I found out that they no longer need me because "there's no money" to pay me. As I was leaving, I saw freshly renovated rooms, a huge new plasma, and a crowd of workers busy expanding the summer terrace. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 762 You deserved it 248
Today, I had a phone call from a company I was applying to. It was going really well, until the call ended. Now since I'm so used to calling my girlfriend, I ended the call with, "Love you, bye." And if things couldn't get any worse, I started swearing to myself. The recruitment officer heard me. I forgot to hang up. FML I agree, your life sucks 416 You deserved it 898
Today, I got locked out of my house in my pajamas while trying to take the trash out. My neighbor offered to help, but only after taking a picture of me for "future laughs." FML I agree, your life sucks 369 You deserved it 144
This is usually followed by the "plotting their demise knowing that you will never actually act on it" phase.