Health: Today, while riding my bike on the sidewalk, I came across a...

By magicman - 04/07/2012 09:04 - United States

Today, while riding my bike on the sidewalk, I came across a ladder. To avoid bad luck, I swerved around it into the street. I got hit by a car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 166

You deserved it 31 455

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Same thing different taste

Careless and carefree

By Anonymous - 12/08/2022 07:00 - Romania

Today, when I crossed the street, I almost died because of a careless driver, but when I crossed it again on my way back, I got hit by a bicycle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 709

You deserved it 306

BIKES

By ihpgolj - 18/06/2009 05:31 - United States

Today, I was riding my bike down a road I know is quite hazardous. Having almost been hit in the same spot the day before, I rode across the intersection very satisfied without having been injured. Until I crashed into the guy front of me and flipped over my handlebars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 884

You deserved it 43 990

By Tequila - 20/06/2011 16:12 - Netherlands

Today, my bike abruptly stopped working, torpedoing me headfirst into the sidewalk. I lay there in agony for a few minutes, and the only guy who saw it happen said, "Lucky you didn't get hurt!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 598

You deserved it 3 219

By Lackadaisical - 15/01/2010 00:01 - United States

Today, I thought I'd be safe by looking before crossing a one way street unlike I normally do. Too bad I looked the wrong way and didn't see the car that hit me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 240

You deserved it 35 675

Opportunist

By Mick - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 865 426

You deserved it 95 092

We meet again

By Antonin - 13/11/2020 05:03 - Switzerland

Today, I missed my bus to school, so I took my bike. The bus that I missed ignored a stop sign on its way back, making me crash into it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 983

You deserved it 116

Hey there!

By Chanby - 04/05/2023 12:00 - United States - Portland

Today, I was walking down the street when I saw a friend I hadn't seen in years. I was so excited to catch up with her that I ran across the street without looking and almost got hit by a car. I ended up stumbling out of panic and landed on a pile of trash on the sidewalk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 250

You deserved it 1 058

Funny how?

By funnyguyNOT - 05/04/2009 21:39 - United States

Today, a car was waiting for me to cross the street so I thought it would be funny to slowly limp across the street. When I got to the end, I jumped as high as I could to show I was faking. Turns out I tripped and hit my head hard on the sidewalk. That car took me to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 319

You deserved it 285 249

Rekt

By Shaun - 16/06/2009 02:13 - United States

Today, I rode my bike to work. While biking on the road, I gave a hand signal for turning left. A car passing the opposite way veered towards me and attempted to give me a high five. I now have cuts all over my body and my bike is in two pieces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88 379

You deserved it 6 174

Bystander

By Chops - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was walking from my office to the place I had parked my car, a distance of approximately three blocks. As I was about to round the last corner, I was forced to dive out of the way of a speeding car. When I looked up, I noticed that it was my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100 355

You deserved it 4 537

drunkandfml 11

Wednesday 4 July 2012 16:43

Oh, the irony

Thisismypchere 8

Wednesday 4 July 2012 16:42

Sounds like it worked perfectly.

Comments

AnagenisisZagus 13

Wednesday 4 July 2012 23:00

Did you die?

LuckyLynx7732 5

Wednesday 4 July 2012 23:17

You can avoid bad luck, but you can't fix stupid.

Arile 5

Thursday 5 July 2012 0:06

Well then..... I guess if u walk around a ladder u get bad luck

snafu63 0

Thursday 5 July 2012 0:41

maybe you should ride your bike in the street where it belongs.

rapunzel3416 28

Thursday 5 July 2012 1:08

Edit: About 6 people bet me to this comment.

rapunzel3416 28

Thursday 5 July 2012 1:11

Darn beat. Can't even edit my own edit right.

Neex97 4

Thursday 5 July 2012 2:00

Thats not bad luck thats you being an idiot

Brilliant66star 17

Thursday 5 July 2012 3:18

...and you ain't even 'shamed! FYL.

eloheljeykeh 0

Thursday 5 July 2012 4:41

Jonathan? Is that you? Getting hit by cars over the summer, I see?

Bordo1203 3

Thursday 5 July 2012 5:49

You should've gone over the ladder.

Lily16Ann 2

Thursday 5 July 2012 5:57

You got hit by a car yet your on FML.........

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The Top

Today, it was Mother’s Day. My mom died when I was young, so I deleted all of my social media, to avoiding seeing all my friends hanging out with their aging, but healthy, loving mothers. Then my dad decided to remind me what day it was and to wish my abusive stepmom a happy Mother’s Day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 320

You deserved it 143

Today, I, an insecure high school student, told my 11-year-old sister that I got my period in third grade. She responded with, “What?! Then how come you didn’t have tits until last year?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 078

You deserved it 198

Today, I saw my old high school crush in a grocery store. I panicked, because the last time I saw her, I was spouting embarrassing teenage incel horseshit at her, so I dodged out of view to look at something. She'd seen me, came over, and found me awkwardly crouched in the vegetable section, staring at a cucumber. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96

You deserved it 614

Today, the girl I've loved for years kissed me. Then she started crying and wiping her mouth, and had a panic attack. I had to help her through it, tell her that it was no big deal, and that it would never happen again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 601

You deserved it 2 332

Today, my wedding is scheduled for next week. Today is also the day my whole family had an epic falling out, resulting in my mother disowning my brother. Apart from having them taking turns sobbing at me through the phone, they're also not coming to the wedding. I paid the hotel rooms in advance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 707

You deserved it 1 346

Today, I took a late-night shower. When I got out afterwards, the bathroom door was ajar, and I could have sworn I heard the faint patter of footsteps in the kitchen. "It's probably the cat," I told myself. Then I went upstairs and saw my cat asleep on my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 104

You deserved it 2 901

Same thing different taste

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