Miscellaneous: Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss... - FML

By Anonymous - 05/07/2012 19:10 - United States - Findlay

Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a Diet Coke?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 803

You deserved it 10 015

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By J - 11/02/2009 07:14 - United States

Today, at lunch I ordered a coke. The waiter replied "diet coke?" and I corrected him saying, "No, regular coke." He shook his head and said again, "diet coke." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 206

You deserved it 8 859

By goldendarkness - 09/07/2016 01:34

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to stop by a drive-thru on the way to his place. I asked him to order a Coke for me, at which point he asked if I wanted to make it a Diet Coke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 782

You deserved it 2 972

By hadrienne's pall - 13/05/2016 19:25 - Canada - Markham

Today, I asked a girl at the restaurant I work at if she'd had enough to eat. When she said yes, I said, "Are you sure?" I didn't realize how insulting it sounded until her equally overweight mom was up in my face, demanding to see my manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 989

You deserved it 4 293

By Hungryman - 15/01/2010 21:30 - France

Today, I ordered a Diet Coke with my meal from a fast food restaurant. Turns out, they didn't give me diet. My blood sugar spiked and I was sick for hours later. I'm a diabetic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 428

You deserved it 8 265

Thanks Karen

By Anonymous - 26/08/2014 15:30 - United States - Gloucester

Today, I was taking a customer's order, when she said she'd better go for a salad, because she was getting fat. She was actually very slim, so I told her she wasn't fat at all. She took one look at me and snorted "Yeah, not compared to you, that's for sure." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 702

You deserved it 4 372

By first time at McDonald's in months... - 27/03/2013 05:04 - United States

Today, I was at McDonald's. As I left the counter with the food, I heard the cashier mutter, "Fat ass." I turned around and demanded to see the manager. Once he came and heard the situation, he looked at me and said, "Well, it's not like he's wrong, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 245

You deserved it 19 360

First impressions

By Anonymous - 03/03/2021 23:01

Today, while on a date, I accidentally ordered "diet water" instead of saying "diet coke". FML

I agree, your life sucks 728

You deserved it 303

Typecast

By nerd - 16/10/2009 15:08 - Singapore

Today, I was on cloud nine when the beautiful waitress I frequently ordered takeaways from told me she didn't need to take my name as she remembers me from before. When I got my food, I saw the sales slip. On it she had written, "Cheeseburger - Fries - Coke - Nerdy guy with bad haircut." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 430

You deserved it 5 767

Mr Bean

By Anonymous - 09/04/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I was at a work lunch, and the waiter brought me a soda I hadn’t ordered. I thought it was a free mistake, so I took a sip. It was actually my boss’s drink. As soon as I noticed, I tried to give it back, but he just stared at me and said, "It’s fine. I’ve already seen you drink it now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 64

You deserved it 477

By fatty - 29/04/2015 01:36 - United States - West Chester

Today, I was sitting in McDonald's. A lady came up to me and started complaining about the bad service, and asked for the manager. I told her that I didn't work there. "But you must, someone that fat has to work here!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 336

You deserved it 5 249

Next

Top comments

plasticsmile42 2

Thursday 5 July 2012 23:04

Wow, what an ass. dont let him/her get to you op!

MainPrism 16

Thursday 5 July 2012 23:05

I really hope you obeyed the cardinal rule of the food industry & waited til after you got your food before telling the waiter what you thought of them... If not, you ate something extra with your food... Pretty much gauranteed...

Comments

northbaldwinbabe 18

Sunday 25 May 2014 19:00

I'd be fuming and refuse to leave a tip. On the check, I'd write, "Clearly your parents raised you without manners, so here's this for you: a nice big tip saying **** YOU!"

Onyx3288 22

Sunday 15 June 2014 21:22

No, I would just like to see the manager let me guess not-really-a-waiter-but-an-actor

blobishness 8

Sunday 22 June 2014 6:04

I would intentionally not give a tip if my waiter was an asshole like that

magnetic_aura 26

Wednesday 17 September 2014 9:31

Well, there goes their tip! Don't let the waiter's rudeness bother you, OP!

Paksenarrion 24

Saturday 8 November 2014 18:15

That is one time I would condone no tip except maybe a nasty message written on a napkin and a report to their manager!

fantasyworld 37

Sunday 21 December 2014 21:57

That's incredibly rude, report him to his manager.

HunkyMumbles 27

Monday 23 February 2015 18:16

Thumbs up for Gabriel Iglesias!

athrowaway 5

Sunday 5 April 2015 8:41

Tell him, "ms, I'm-not-tipping wants to see a manager"

ice2eskimos 3

Thursday 16 April 2015 21:02

Brilliant

harpermurphy 5

Saturday 16 July 2016 8:40

He's only a waiter he's going to get no where in life so it's ok

23
24
25
26
27

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

The Top

Today, while assisting my kindergartener with distance learning, it became apparent what an incompetent bumbling mess his teacher is. In-person learning resumes next week, and I'm terrified to leave my child in a classroom with this man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 793

You deserved it 160

Today, I found on the internet pictures of me sleeping. I sleep naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 194

You deserved it 7 837

Today, I got fired, apparently for being racist to black people. When I told my boyfriend, he couldn't stop laughing. He's black. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 529

You deserved it 3 393

Today, a body positivity influencer I greatly respected and admired suddenly died. When I tried to read about her death, all I found were thousands of comments fat-shaming and mocking her. I was crying so hard that people thought I'd had a death in the family, which I kind of did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 740

Today, it's my birthday, none of my friends wished me a thing. I spent the whole day crying and then decided to call few of them and sobbingly demanded an explanation. Most of them didn't pick up, the rest called me a drama queen, saying that my birthday isn't as important as I think. FML

I agree, your life sucks 775

You deserved it 1 803

Today, my boss fired me for being on Facebook at work. He did it via a wall post on Facebook saying, "ur fired." Six of my friends liked this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 059

You deserved it 38 621