Miscellaneous: Today, I pretended to drunk text some friends. When in all reality...

By Anonymous - 10/09/2011 05:05 - United States

Today, I pretended to drunk text some friends. When in all reality I was sitting home all alone. I don't know what's worse: that I pretended that I was social and drunk, or that the friend I said I was with was actually with them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 146

You deserved it 52 451

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Same thing different taste

By hello - 11/07/2010 00:57 - Jordan

Today, I was so bored at a family gathering that I pretended to be busy texting the whole time. I don't know what's worse, that I'm not close to anyone in my family, or that I have no one close enough to text to about such things. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 348

You deserved it 8 825

By slondons - 18/01/2011 20:53 - United Kingdom

Today, my friends were acting strange around me. This afternoon, I got a text asking me to meet them out for a couple of drinks. Because of all the strange acting, I decided to tell them I'd go and then not go. I just found out they had been planning me a surprise party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 635

You deserved it 52 375

Self report

By banana12321 - 02/04/2015 04:40 - United States - Fresno

Today, I thought I had gotten away with throwing a party while my folks were gone the night before. They came home and I was as sweet as possible. I could tell they were not buying it, but I thought I was in the clear. Later, they told me I had drunk-dialled them and spilled the beans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 208

You deserved it 30 506

By nolife - 30/08/2012 01:33 - United States - Richmond

Today, I purposely misspelled words while texting my boyfriend so he would think I was out partying and having a life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 213

You deserved it 30 081

By marmarr - 15/05/2011 05:20 - United States

Today, I pretended to not be able to go out with a friend so I could hang with my boyfriend at the movies. When I sat down I received a text that said, "Turn around." It was her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 506

You deserved it 70 859

Classic

By Diane - 12/09/2025 20:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I pretended to be on the phone to avoid small talk with someone from my building. I spoke loudly into the phone while walking by them. My phone rang in the middle of my fake conversation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50

You deserved it 472

Who'll tell him?

By Anonymous - 03/03/2023 12:00 - Japan

Today, the girl I like said she was out drinking with a friend. I'm pretty sure she has been lying about all the times she has "fallen asleep" and could not talk, and is actually seeing other people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 330

You deserved it 833

I hate small talk

By billie - 13/08/2025 03:00 - United States - Boston

Today, I pretended to be texting to avoid talking to an old classmate I saw at the grocery store. Unfortunately, my phone rang while I was “texting.” It was the classmate. I had no choice but to answer, while we were both standing 10 feet apart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 127

You deserved it 434

By SDCore - 12/02/2015 00:40 - United States - Glenview

Today, I got drunk at a party. I didn't want my parents to know, so I took out my phone, called my parents, and asked them not to tell them I'm drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 836

You deserved it 39 923

By julie24 - 30/05/2014 02:30 - France

Today, I was partying with friends. At around midnight, I sent a text message to my friend to reassure her, saying that of course I could handle my drink. That's the last thing I can remember about the evening. It's a total blank from that point onwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 194

You deserved it 46 131

Runninvegan 8

Saturday 10 September 2011 12:18

Time to hit up the Chloroform....

Bunnehs 0

Saturday 10 September 2011 12:32

YDI for thinking that being drunk makes you cool.

Comments

stevenmx86 7

Saturday 10 September 2011 16:11

Nobody thinks you're "cool" because you're drunk texting. Also, drunk doesn't equal social dip shit... Grow up you're obviously like 13...

5t3ff1k4h 44

Saturday 10 September 2011 17:06

People my age (21) still believe it's "cool" to be drunk. A lot of people drink in a social setting which is fine, but no one understands that it's not cool or attractive to be sloppy drunk.

dude443 4

Saturday 10 September 2011 16:51

You could have just pretended to not know who u were with cuz u were drunk you know ...

leadman1989 15

Saturday 10 September 2011 17:10

Asshat. Insulting you dumb posters is becoming hard... Sometimes I get drunk with no alcohol seriously.

metalhawj 0

Saturday 10 September 2011 17:29

Fake and gay. U said you were home alone and with your friends

kiakia0131 23

Saturday 10 September 2011 18:03

FYL because you were alone with nothing better to do than to lie about your partying. However, YDI for pretending to be drunk. You don't need to drink to have a good time anyway.