Gross and Kids: Today, I found out that, when mad at us, my son picks the tops...

By Pimpleeater - 20/12/2011 07:45 - New Zealand

Today, I found out that, when mad at us, my son picks the tops off his shoulder-pimples and sprinkles them in our food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 481

You deserved it 5 686

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Same thing different taste

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By imblue42 - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I walked into the dining room to find my mom popping pimples on my dad's back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 601

You deserved it 3 796

By beya - 31/08/2009 22:05 - Canada

Today, I woke up to my five year old son picking off the scabs from his chicken pox and dropping them into my open mouth as I slept. FML

I agree, your life sucks 94 000

You deserved it 5 898

Proof

By George Saunders - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I accused my son of faking being sick. He then blew chunks all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 154

You deserved it 54 235

Hair-raising

By what the fuck????? - 17/02/2022 16:01 - United States - Denver

Today, while at a restaurant, I watched in horror as my daughter picked a hair out of her food and continued eating it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 693

You deserved it 272

By Sadmom - 14/09/2016 02:15 - United States - Cherry Hill

Today, I found out that my son thinks it's acceptable to use words like "on fleek" in high school level essays. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 962

You deserved it 1 435

The trail

By Anonymous - 10/01/2010 10:45 - Canada

Today, I was wondering why my home smelled so weird, until I found out that my 4 year old son had been secretly scattering around food he didn't like to eat throughout the house. How did I find out? No one else in this family leaves half eaten spinach all over my underwear drawer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 881

You deserved it 3 900

By eenkoekje - 13/05/2011 07:20

Today, I was called by my son's school to pick him up. Apparently, he snorted baking soda, crushed aspirin, and flour because he thought it was coke. Where did I go wrong raising this twerp? FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 344

You deserved it 15 926

Never again

By Lex - 21/05/2025 21:00 - United States - Edison

Today, I gave my kid some Pop Rocks. He shoveled a handful in his mouth, then screamed when they started popping and spat them all over the carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 122

You deserved it 450

Dirty rice

By Dirtyrice - 24/12/2019 20:00 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, my 8-year-old son decided to make some rice for lunch. When we had it, I noticed a horrid gritty taste. It turns out, he puts dirt in the rice to make "Dirty Rice". FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 751

You deserved it 416

By lalanon - 03/04/2009 05:16 - Australia

Today, my friends were being rude to me, so I decided to be nice to a boy that didn't have many friends. While I was talking to him he popped a pimple on his face and tasted it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 187 009

You deserved it 33 468

MorningGranite 3

Tuesday 20 December 2011 11:56

Thats.....gross

ajmacrae 5

Tuesday 20 December 2011 11:58

EEEEEEEEEWWWWWWW!!!! I just threw up in my lecture when I read that

Comments

Gongo5671 0

Thursday 22 December 2011 7:02

Can somebody say EW!!!!!?

Gainer_ 6

Thursday 22 December 2011 7:14

I'd be blowing my loads in that little sh!ts breakfast!!!

FaiIingMushroom 0

Thursday 22 December 2011 10:36

Awww ewww WTF

bumnumber1 0

Thursday 22 December 2011 10:36

I'd get him put into juvinile detention for that. period.

kimberlysoileau 6

Thursday 22 December 2011 12:57

I'd tear his little shitass up! I don't care how old he is! That's ******* disgusting!

DRyankeepeach 1

Thursday 22 December 2011 13:29

That is disgusting!

dtm3 3

Thursday 22 December 2011 18:04

What a nasty f@&k!!!

coconutClaire 1

Thursday 22 December 2011 21:23

Why is he making your meals that often to have access to them?

Hammer01 8

Friday 23 December 2011 17:13

You all need help

Barn312009 0

Saturday 24 December 2011 0:11

He needs a boot the face. And proactive...

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I got up and left for work despite being really sick, because I had a big meeting. Halfway to work, in deadlocked traffic, my boss texts me to let me know he's rescheduling the meeting to tomorrow because of personal conflicts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 960

You deserved it 2 863

Today, I drove 12 hours with 6 screaming little girls. They were arguing about things that should've been in the Lego movie. They watched it 4 times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 973

You deserved it 5 303

Today, I discovered the "may have a laxative effect" warning on my sugar-free jelly beans should actually read "don't fart after consuming". FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 902

You deserved it 5 686

Today, I seriously considered labelling myself as 'in a relationship' on Facebook, even though I haven't been in one since '92, so I can hide just how desperate I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 188

You deserved it 7 732

Today, and for the past year, my boyfriend keeps wanting to arm-wrestle with me. I’m rather petite and I don’t exercise a lot, yet I’m still waiting for him to win, just even once. FML

I agree, your life sucks 557

You deserved it 137

Today, I went back to work after a horrible bout of respiratory illness. After a few hours of using hot tea, cough drops, and tissues to deal with my lingering cough, I found out that my asshole coworker has filed a formal complaint about me disrupting her concentration. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 121

You deserved it 4 293